Naruto Mitarashi and Team Thirteen
by microzombie
Summary: Naruto is saved from a mob by everyone's favorite psycho, who adopts him, seeing herself in him. How will the number one knucklehead ninja turn out when he is raised by the Scary Snake Lady? Let's find out.
1. What did I just say?

Chapter One: Lynching.

Anko Mitarashi grinned as a plate of dango was set down in front of her. Nothing like dango to celebrate an enemy breaking under interrogation. She sighed in contentment when she finished the first six dango and reached for the second stick. It was halfway to her mouth before she heard a commotion outside. She heard yelling and was that…crying? She stood up dango still in her hand and jumped to the roof, and looked for the source of the noise. A large crowd was forming around…no way. Anko's anger was aroused and she began sprinting across the roofs towards the mob.

The 4 year old blond child in the middle of the mob holding onto a small stuffed bear, and was crying in fear. A man raised a knife and prepared to stab him in the chest when he cried out in pain and covered his arm. The arm had a senbon embedded in the wrist, no, was that _a dango stick?_ In a blur of motion a blue-black haired woman in a tan trench coat, metal mesh shirt, and tan skirt suddenly stood between him and the crowd with a kunai in hand.

"Come any closer assholes, and it's going to get very fun for me." Anko raised her knife in a defensive stance

"Oh look, the snake bitch, maybe we can get rid of her along with the demon brat." A voice sprang from the crowd.

Anko just smiled

"When you try that, you had better make sure your heart belongs to god, because your ass is damn sure gonna belong to me."

The mob took a step backwards at that. A couple of men charged her, but she dealt with them by throwing them into a couple of their friends. There was a _woosh_ of air as another shinobi landed in the circle. The newly arrived ANBU in a dog mask drew his katana and assumed a defensive stance towards the crowd. A few more men got the courage to run at them.

"Nice of you to show up Kakashi." Anko flipped an idiot over her head

"Had to say my name didn't you Anko?" Kakashi Hatake dropped a woman to the ground

A few jounin arrived in a group and, seeing the looks of anger directed towards them, the mob scattered, dropping their tools in the process. A group of ANBU grabbed a couple of them and were gone as quickly as they appeared, taking the men to the Chief of Torture and Interrogation, Ibiki Morino, to find out who had orchestrated the lynching.

A jounin named Asuma Sarutobi walked forward to Anko, who had just noticed Kakashi was gone.

Anko was mumbling something about perverts and disappearing acts when Asuma got within 5 feet of her. She looked towards him. She looked down as she felt something grab hold of her legs. The little blond was hiding behind her.

"Anko, give us the kid." Asuma ordered

"No." Anko surprised herself with that one.

"Hokage's orders." Asuma said in a brusque voice

The tokubetsu jounin looked from the kid, who was looking in fear at her, to Asuma

"Only if I can come with him." _What the hell did I just say?_

Anko followed the several ANBU and Asuma towards the hokage's

mansion. The kid was on her back, because of the sprained ankle he had gotten running from the angry mob.

"By the way what's your name?" she questioned

"Naruto Uzumaki, what's yours?" he said in an upbeat voice

"Anko Mitarashi. Whats with the excitement squirt?"

"I've never had a friend besides Dogface-san and he isn't around a lot."

An ANBU chuckled at Kakashi being called Dogface, but Anko was taken aback. Kakashi was this kid's only friend. She wasn't usually the sympathetic type, in fact she was usually downright sadistic, but this kid wasn't unlike her, when she arrived back in Konoha after she left Orochimaru.

The group walked into the hokage's office without knocking, and Anko set Naruto on the ground. After greeting them all, Hiruzen Sarutobi dismissed the ANBU and looked to Anko and Asuma.

"So what happened?" He looked at Anko. Anko told him the story and he stayed quiet the whole time, but Naruto interrupted a couple times to explain how awesome Anko was. On the third time Anko couldn't help herself.

"Short stuff we all know I'm awesome, no need to emphasize that fact" she smiled.

Asuma groaned _these two being friends is going to be hell on whoever their target is._

Anko finished the story and the Hokage nodded his head deep in thought.

"Well, I guess we have no choice, I'll have Asuma escort Naruto back to his apartment and…"

"Wait…this kid lives alone?" Anko interrupted

"Yes, he has ever since he could care for himself." The Sondaime said sadly.

"Well, that's dumb, the kid is about to get lynched and he lives alone." Anko gave the Hokage a bored expression

"We don't have much choice." The Hokage answered.

"He can live with me." Anko blurted

"It isn't legal."

"I'll adopt him."

That made Asuma and the Hokage start.

"Are you sure Anko, I mean you're only 18." Asuma said

"Are you saying I'm not responsible enough to take care of a kid?" Anko glared at Asuma

"Uh no…"

Anko turned back to Asuma and grinned as the Hokage removed the adoption papers from a drawer in his desk. Anko knelt down and looked Naruto in the eyes.

"Naruto how would you like a mom?"

He perked up at that.

"That'd be great!" He smiled

"I guess that settles it, you're Naruto Mitarashi now." Anko grinned

The newly minted mother and son walked out the door, and the Hokage sighed when he realized they had forgotten to sign the papers.


	2. First Day

**I DON'T OWN NARUTO**

**Reviews are appreciated.**

**Enjoy : D**

Chapter 2: First Day

Anko and her new son were grinning when they walked out of the Hokage's office and the secretary gave them a look that said _drop dead_. Anko smiled (she saved her grin for when she wanted to be sadistic, and for people she liked) flipped her bird and kept walking. She wasn't letting anything ruin this night. Not for him at least. When they walked outside Anko turned left going up.

"Anko-san, the way out is this way." Naruto pointed right, down the ramp

"Let me show you how shinobi travel squirt." Anko smirked. Naruto ran after his mom.

"Get on my back." Anko kneeled down. Naruto obeyed. And with a gust of wind they were flying through the air and they landed about a block away. Then Anko jumped again and they landed next to Ichiraku Ramen, then again and again until she cleared a fence. Naruto, in between his laughing and trying not to be sick read a sign

Training Ground Forty-Four

No Trespassing

Violators Will be Prosecuted

Spray painted under "Training Ground Forty-Four" was a crude sign that said "Forest of Death." Over "violators" was painted "Survivors"

Not long after that they arrived at a tower in what Naruto assumed was the center of the Forest of Death. Anko landed just inside a window. Naruto got off her back and looked at Anko questioningly.

"Yours and mine, we share it until I can mooch another one off of someone." Anko pointed to the lone bed in the room.

Naruto climbed into the bed built for a single person and Anko jumped in face down. His new mom was hyperactive.

Anko sat up in bed and almost freaked that someone else was in her bed, until she remembered last night. Anko got out of the bed quietly and walked into her kitchen. She didn't think kids enjoyed dango, sake, and eggs in the morning, so she cooked a couple bowls of ramen.

"Yo, brat, wake up I bring gifts." Anko shouted

Naruto sat straight up. Looked around smiled and said

"Morning, mom."

Anko about fell over. Mom was unexpected. Nice, but unexpected. Anko and held up a bowl of ramen.

"Since you're not getting out of bed I guess you don't want a miso with extra pork?" The tokubetsu jounin smirked when the child jumped out of bed. He grabbed the bowl and started wolfing it down.

"Whoa, slow down, squirt, you're gonna puke at this rate." Anko ruffled his hair

The child's hands slowed considerably and he began chewing instead of swallowing his food whole. Anko started in on her own bowl. By the time she was halfway done Naruto was looking longingly at her own bowl. She looked at him and pushed it over. She knew what it was like to be hungry.

When the Mitarashis were done with breakfast Anko threw a sponge to Naruto and told him to go scrub himself.

"You're so dirty if you laid down in the dirt I wouldn't be able find you." Anko walked back to her room and began getting dressed for her first day as a mom. When she was done checking that her kunai were all in the right spots, she dressed Naruto, done with his bath, in an oversized shirt and carried him piggyback to a clothing shop in the village. She stopped in front of a clothing store and walked inside. And walked right back out. The look on the owners face said that Anko would probably end up knocking him out, and then there would be _another_ restraining order against her.

"Come on, brat, I know a guy down the street who isn't a jerk." She was surprised when Naruto took her hand, but she didn't pull away. She saw the looks people gave both of them, but no one, but nobody messed with Anko, and now, by extension, nobody messed with Naruto.

Anko and her son walked into the small clan owned shop and had Naruto pick out his clothes. She winced as he picked up an orange jumpsuit. She asked the shopkeeper to take him and fit him for a dozen t-shirts and around 6 pairs of pants. While he was busy she took the jumpsuit on the counter and all of the ones on the rack and hid them behind a wall of newly delivered boxes. No reason to tell him that it looked ridiculous. The two trench coats would look ridiculous on a child, but hey, trench coats were awesome. When Naruto and the shopkeeper came back in, he was dismayed to find his jumpsuit was gone.

"Mom, did you see someone take my jumpsuit."

"Nope, sorry," Anko answered back quickly ", but how about an extra trench coat, and a trip to a friend's house?"

Jumpsuit forgotten Naruto jumped for joy at the prospect of having a new friend.

Anko purchased the 12 shirts and 6 pants in black and handed the bag to Naruto, who walked out ahead of her. She pointed to the boxes and mouth _They're behind there_. The shopkeeper smiled and nodded his understanding. Anko ran to catch up to her kid and picked him up and put him on her shoulder as they walked through Konoha. They finally arrived at the Kayija home on the edge of Konoha around 20 minutes later. Anko walked in without knocking and greeted the man sitting in a chair sharpening a katana.

"Hi Anko, what are you doing in my house?" the man asked in a hostile voice

"Now, Ishikawa, is that anyway to talk to a goddess such as myself?" Anko grinned

Both people laughed and Ishikawa asked

"Who's the brat?'"

"This is my squirt, Naruto."Anko grinned

"_Anko Mitarashi_, has a child?" A new voice said.

"That's what I said Mokoto."

Mokoto Kayija entered with a small girl behind her. The girl was wearing a purple sleeveless shirt and red pants that came to her ankles, but had no shoes. Naruto smiled when he saw her, but she hid behind her mother's grey pants tugging on her orange shirt.

"Mom, who is that?" she asked in a quiet voice.

"Tenten, that's Naruto Mitarashi, Anko's son."

"Is he scary like Anko-san?"

That drew a laugh from everyone in the room except the two children. Naruto didn't understand what was scary about his mom, and Tenten was deadly serious about the scary snake lady.

"My kid isn't nearly as terrifying as I am." Anko smirked

"Well I guess we can go play then." Tenten ran outside into the backyard of the Kayija home. Naruto followed his newfound friend and took a handful of offered shuriken.

"We're gonna play ninja. Those red circles are bad guys. We just do this." Tenten threw several shuriken and nailed her targets dead center. Naruto tried the same and managed to hit one out of five. The Kajiyas clapped, but Anko groaned. He was going to want training now.

The two children retrieved their shuriken and once again Tenten nailed all five targets. Naruto concentrated. He heard Anko yell "Pretend it's the guy who stole your jumpsuit." Naruto threw his shuriken and hit three out of five this time. This went on for a while until Anko got bored of watching her kid get destroyed at ninja.

"Hey brat let's head home." Anko leaned down and put Naruto on her back. Naruto waved goodbye to his new friend and they left jumping across the rooftops.

"Hey mom can I have a shinobi book?"

Anko sighed, her suspicions confirmed, but grinned and thought _why not? He sucks as is, and I have nothing to do when I don't have missions._

Anko stopped on the roof of a shop and sat Naruto down.

"I'll be right back, so stay here." Anko went inside and paid for a small book of shinobi stories. She went back to the roof, wondering if her charge could read. Apparently not since he just gave her a blank stare when they sat down to read it back at the tower. Then and there, as they read stories about the legendary sannin and the kage, Anko decided train her kid to be a shinobi.

**THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT SO FAR GUYS. 2 CHAPTERS TONIGHT : P. The next will be up soon.**

**Going to an orthopedic doctor tomorrow for pending surgery. May or may not post a chapter.**


	3. Training

**I DON'T OWN NARUTO**

**Enjoy :D **

Chapter 3: Training

Anko was up at five A.M. making herself a breakfast of dango and sake (Anko SOP called for dango at every meal. Including snacks and midnight-munchies). By six she walked into the bedroom with two large pieces of steel, started bashing them together and started shouting,

"Wake up maggot, you want to be a shinobi and you can't even wake up with my assistance. Is my assistance not good enough for you?"

Naruto had hit the floor and was now standing up looking at Anko.

"Five minutes to get dressed, and be outside, if you're not out there by that time be prepared for extra exercises." Anko walked out of the room.

Naruto pulled a black t-shirt and shorts, and a pair of black ninja sandals covered his feet. He ran outside and stood in front of Anko.

"30 seconds to spare, ape." Anko said with a blank face, secretly pleased that Naruto had made it out here in time.

"Ok, let's get started right now we're gonna work on your ranged skills, that aim at the Kayija house was pitiful." She threw a kunai in front of him.

"That's your only weapon until I see fit to give you something more, break it and I guess you're doing taijutsu training barehanded." Anko pointed to a target, "Keep throwing that kunai until you hit the center every time , or your arm goes numb. Whichever comes first." An hour later Naruto's arm went numb.

"You can only throw kunai for an hour before you go numb? As punishment you're running laps around Konoha." Anko scoffed as she picked Naruto up to bring him out if the Forest of Death. She was 10 feet off the ground when she dropped him. She grinned when he hit the ground running. Kid was already picking up how to land like a shinobi. 8 laps around Konoha later Naruto fell down in front of Izumo and Kotetsu, the chunin who got the boring jobs. Izumo sighed when he dropped, but Kotetsu grinned when Anko dropped out of the sky and put him back on his feet, yelling something about being lazier than Kakashi.

"Anko's being a little hard on him, don't you think?" Izumo asked Kotetsu

"Nah, the fox kid has more stamina than anyone else in the village." So he said, but the next time Naruto went by he threw him a bottle of water. This cost Kotetsu a punch in the abdomen from Anko, who let him drink anyway.

By 6 P.M. Anko had counted 250 laps around Konoha, and he'd only dropped from exhaustion twice. Not good enough when it was 500 and no exhaustion, then she'd be satisfied, but this was good for a first day. As he stopped by the gate he fell for the third time only to be caught by Izumo. Izumo smiled when heard that Naruto was already snoring. Anko walked over, her hands in her pockets.

"Not bad for a first day." He handed Naruto over.

"not at all" Kotetsu added.

"Well, he's my kid, did you expect any less?" Anko smirked.

"Guess not, later, Anko." Kotetsu turned and walked away Izumo followed him waving goodbye. Anko nodded to the hokage's errand boys and jumped towards the Forest of Death, and home.

It was around a month later when Naruto woke one morning to find a note on his face. In marker…

_To: Brat/Squirt/Maggot/Son/Naruto-kun_

_From: Konoha's most beloved goddess_

_Hey, squirt, I got an emergency mission from the Hokage, and won't be back until tonight, you'll find some instant ramen in the cabinet, and your babysitter will be there around nine o'clock. He'll be training you in some ninjutsu today. Once that's done continue your kunai training and do some laps around the village. Izumo and Kotetsu will be watching for you, so you better go or else I'll know : D._

_P.S. My dango and sake are wired with paper bombs, so don't touch them. _

Naruto read the letter from his mother in the mirror. The letter started on the left side of his forehead and curved down until it ended on his chin. After wondering why she wrote it on his face he showered and got dressed. He walked downstairs and found a member of the ANBU sitting on his couch.

"Hi Dogface-san!" Naruto brightened Kakashi removed his ANBU mask and looked at Naruto.

"I wish you would stop calling me that." He smiled a little bit

"I wish you would tell me why you wear a mask under your ANBU mask." Naruto shot back

_The kid's already starting to pick up Anko's logic 'When in doubt be a smartass.'_

"Well you want to get right to it?" Kakashi sighed

"Well first I should tell you that mom booby-trapped her sake and dango."

"Yeah she booby trapped the ramen cabinet to." Kakashi showed a singed hair.

Naruto laughed, and realized that was meant for him. She was taking his training seriously.

The pair walked outside and stopped. Kakashi turned to Naruto.

"First is the Transformation Jutsu, it's used to infiltrate strongholds and to fool and pursuers." To demonstrate Kakashi transformed into a rock, which almost made Naruto burst out laughing. Of all things why a rock?

"Ok, now you." The rock said.

"I don't know the hand signs…"

"Oops." Kakashi transformed back and showed him the hand signs to form in order to use the transformation.

Naruto followed his instructions and began practicing his transformation. At first it took him a minute just to form the hand signs, and when he actually performed the jutsu, it wouldn't fool anyone, but a complete fool.

"Keep on it, I'll be over there." Kakashi pointed to a tree on the edge of the clearing.

Three hours later Naruto came running over to Kakashi.

"Dogface, watch this." He shouted

"I told you not to call me-"

"Transform!" _boom_.

When the smoke from Naruto's jutsu cleared, Kakashi almost lost it. It was perfect, and would annoy the hell out of Anko. Kakashi congratulated Naruto on mastering a transformation so quickly.

"Alright, that's enough of that today; I've got to go so I'm going to drop you at the front gate with Izumo and Kotetsu."

"But, I'm supposed to practice with kunai…"

"You're doing it at the gate."

Naruto climbed on Kakashi's back and they set off for the Konoha gate. When they arrived Izumo had just finished painting a bullseye on the wall of Konoha. Kakashi dropped him off, said goodbye, and was gone before Kotetsu knew why Naruto was on top of the guard house.

Naruto pulled his single kunai from his holder, where it bounced around, since nothing else was in there. He practiced until his arm was exhausted, like before, and then began running laps around the village while Kotetsu paced him. When he hit 250 he dropped from exhaustion for the first time and heard a mocking voice.

"Not bad squirt, damn sight better than yesterday." Anko picked him up and took him to the front gate. Izumo and Kotetsu were both seated against the wall and saw Anko carrying Naruto. They stood up and gave her a report on his training. The tokubetsu jounin walked over to where a bullseye was painted on the wall. Around half of the holes were in the 6 inch wide center circle. Naruto smiled, proud of his improvement.

"Alright, brat, you don't get tired as easy, and your kunai accuracy still sucks, but is improving, now show me a transformation."

Naruto carried out the hand signs slowly, which made Anko raise an eyebrow. They were good hand signs, but he need to speed up. They'd work on that tomorrow.

"Transform!" Naruto shouted. The smoke cleared. Izumo and Kotetsu fell over in stitches and Anko scowled instead of laughing like she felt like. In front of the trio stood another Anko, but instead of a trench coat and metal mesh she wore a t-shirt, black pants, and white sneakers. On the T-shirt it said _Hello My name is: Smartass._ On the back it read _and_ _I'm gonna kick your ass :3_

"What do you think brat?" Anko asked Anko

"I don't think you're worthy of my beautiful figure, squirt." Anko cracked a small grin

"But, don't you think two is better than one, you maggot?" The Naruto-turned-Anko asked his mother.

Izumo wiped tears from his eyes, and put his hand on the real Anko's shoulder.

"I think the kid deserves another kunai after that one."

Anko was about to disagree, the transformation was easy to master, but then she had an idea.

"Alright, squirt; I'll give you another kunai _if_ you stay like that through a trip to Ichirakus, the Kayija house, and Dangoya."

"That'll be easy, give me a challenge."

"There's a catch. Everyone has to believe that you're a clone." Anko grinned when she saw the surprise on Naruto's face.

"Alright, let's do it" Naruto grinned and transformed himself to replace his clothes and make himself and exact copy of Anko.

The two Ankos left the two chunin and the seven or eight travelers wondering why two there were two of the same person.

**First of two today. Thanks for all the support, and welcome to any new readers. I know I'm going fast right now ,but I'm going to slow the pace drastically once Naruto hits Genin (three or four chapters from now.)**

**Authors Notes-I'll be very busy this week and next week. Final Exams are starting soon and I'm going to be studying. I also have a surgery scheduled for next week so there will be NO updates on Tuesday, but I'll most likely post several the day before. I'd rather work hard the day before, than type while I'm on morphine. If I did that the Kyuubi might turn into a teletubby and Anko would become the three eyed flying spaghetti monster. Laters.**


	4. Challenge Accepted

**I DONT OWN NARUTO!**

**Welcome to any new readers.**

**ENJOY!**

Chapter 4: Challenge accepted

` `Naruto walked beside Anko, who, thankfully, wasn't rooftop jumping. He wasn't able to do that fluidly yet, and it'd be obvious that one of the Anko's was a fake. The two stopped in front of Dangoya, and walked inside. The waitress raised an eyebrow at two Ankos, but didn't question it. She was a little afraid of Anko. The two sat down and one of them said

"4 dozen dango."

"What type?"

"Doesn't matter." The previously quiet one spoke.

The waitress walked away. The Ankos sat and stared at each other.

"four dozen?" The fake one gulped

"Can't handle it?" The professional dango eater asked

"As if!" Naruto whispered. The plate of dango arrived and the two Ankos both grinned and began wolfing down the sweets. Within 5 minutes both stood and left. Neither of them paid, but the cashier didn't want to ask…

Next was Ichiraku Ramen. The two Ankos entered under the flap and sat on the stools.

"Hey, Teuchi." The old man dipping noodles in boiling water turned and greeted Anko, and prepared to say hello to Naruto, but he wasn't here.

"Where's Naruto, Anko?"

"The squirt's at the house. He's all tuckered out from training today, so I owe him a kunai." Naruto/Anko answered

"Oh, well, what'll ya have?"

"A dozen dango." Anko answered

"Miso with extr-I mean a two dozen dango."

"Ok, wait I have your orders, but why do you have a clone with you?" Teuchi began rolling the dumplings

"Well, the squirt is at the tower, and I was used to having company now, so I brought along a clone, truth be told it's boring with the brat on my back." Anko grinned

Teuchi looked at the other Anko and saw her blushing. Naruto/Anko noticed he was blushing and immediately said

"Yeah, but he's annoying when he gets all hyperactive, like the original sometimes." Naruto/Anko quickly said

"Yeah right Naruto, drop the transformation. Here's your miso with extra pork." Teuchi walked away to another customer.

"He nailed you squirt." Anko burst out laughing

Naruto's face fell in his bowl. He transformed back into himself and ate his ramen eagerly. Anko paid the bill and she and Naruto left Ichiraku. Anko was still laughing that Naruto had been caught so easily.

"He had you figured when you ordered the miso." Anko said in between giggles.

"Well let's go to Tenten's house, and see how quick they figure out I'm not you." Naruto made himself into a replica of Anko again and started towards the Kayija home.

Ishikawa Kayija was reading a magazine on a new type of carbon steel when Anko burst in. Anko came in behind her and pushed her into a chair. Ishikawa looked in surprise as two Ankos wrestled on his floor. He was tempted to pull them apart, but given his non-shinobi background he considered it unwise. Anko was pulling uh…Anko's hair back while attempting to stuff a smoke bomb down her throat. Anko meanwhile was trying to counter the other Anko by stabbing her in the leg. One of them finally won the grappling contest by throwing the other over her shoulder to the ground and standing triumphantly over herself.

Of course Naruto was the one with a foot on his chest. He should have known better than to push his mom, because now he was going to have to explain why Anko just got into a fight with a clone.

"Uh, hey, Ishikawa. You see this is a new jutsu, Anko mixed the dust and shadow clone jutsu and the result is a more durable clone, which is why I'm still alive." Naruto grinned

"Why did you barge into my house?" Ishikawa asked with a bored expression. The real Anko took over and explained that the clone had wanted a new kunai made of carbon steel. Naruto was so surprised that he lost control of the jutsu and almost turned back into himself. Ishikawa had several kunai already made from the new steel and handed one to Anko. Anko in turn embedded it in the ground next to Naruto/Anko's head.

"Well, I guess I'll be going then." Anko waved goodbye to her friend. Naruto took his new kunai and followed his mother.

The pair walked towards the Forest of Death in silence. Naruto released the transformation when they finally entered the gate. Anko turned and saw him looking at her quizzically.

"Why'd you get me a new kunai? Old Man Ichiraku saw right through me."

"I didn't get you a new kunai, I got a clone a new kunai, weren't you listening, but since clones are temporary and have kunai when I make them, why don't you just keep it?" Anko walked away with a grin.

Naruto shook his head and got on his mom's back for the trip through the Forest of Death. Anko landed in the second floor window of the tower and removed a scroll from her pocket. She opened it in a corner of the room and slammed her hand down on it. A bed appeared its place, Anko standing on top of it.

"This is my new bed. You can have the one you've been sleeping in." Anko laid down and immediately set to snoring. Naruto once again just shook his head at how hyperactive his mom was and laid down fully clothed.

That night he had a nightmare.

Naruto was walking down the streets of Konoha with Anko, towards Ichiraku. He suddenly heard a shout behind them.

"It's the snake bitch and the demon brat!" He turned and saw a large mob of people running towards them holding various weapons. They quickly surrounded the pair and Anko drew a kunai.

"Stay down, squirt." Anko flashed a grin at him as she started to battle the crowd. But something was wrong. She was losing. Naruto turned to see a member of the ANBU running towards them. He sighed in relief. Whoever it was would help his mom. The ANBU removed her mask and he heard

"Fire Style, Fireball jutsu!"

And then Anko was engulfed in flames.

Naruto screamed and started running for his mother, but no matter how much he ran he couldn't get to her.

"Bye Naruto." He turned to find the ANBU standing behind him. Her katana was in the air.

The katana fell and Naruto woke up screaming. He started crying hysterically and looking for Anko, but she was right next to him.

"It's alright Naruto, it was just a dream." Anko hugged her child.

"Shhh, it's alright no one will ever hurt you again." Naruto looked into Anko's eyes and he saw that her eyes were completely serious. She meant what she said. No one would ever hurt him again. He sighed in contentment and hugged his mother back.

"I want to protect you to mom." Anko put him down and covered him. She then sat on the edge of his bed until he was breathing steadily. She got up and walked to her own bed. She decided then and there that she would do anything to protect him, because while he had been calling her mom and she had been caring for him, she hadn't really _loved _him. But now, as she lay down and covered herself, she realized why Kakashi, and the Hokage, and so few others had wanted to protect him so badly. Because he was a good kid. He wouldn't ever do anything to hurt anyone of Konoha, and he would do everything to protect those he cared about. Anko closed her eyes and slept well, for the first time in years.

**THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK! Trying to turn these out quick, while keeping them from turning into "ERMAHGERD ANKO AND NARUTO ERS ERSAWM!" Give me a warning if that's what it's turning into. Getting more characters in the next chapter so there will be more than just Anko and Naruto in the story, and I realize this chapter is a bit weak. Next time we'll see Naruto enter the Academy. Yes there's a time-skip of about 4 years. Let's see how getting raised by Anko has effected his personality shall we? Laters.**


	5. Freshmen Class

**WELCOME ANY NEW READERS**

**ENJOY : )**

Chapter 5: Bad Influence

_It has been 4 years since Anko adopted Naruto. In that time she has trained him to a razors edge. And now the time for him to enter the Konoha Shinobi Academy. His three friends Tenten, Shikamaru Nara, and Kiba Inuzuka are entering their Academy classroom. Meanwhile Anko and Naruto are finding the best way to introduce Naruto to the class. As usual when it comes to the psycho snake lady and the #1 knucklehead ninja, "best" means flashy, over-the-top, and, frankly, ridiculous._

The three friends entered class together. Kiba was struggling to keep his puppy, Akamaru, on his head, Tenten was trying to not to notice when everyone stared at the dozens of ninja tools she had on her person. Shikamaru simply walked to the middle of the class sat down and took a nap.

The class was buzzing with children making friends, greeting old ones, and just socializing. This went on for about 15 minutes until a tan man with a horizontal scar running across his face entered the room. He was wearing a chunin vest, so everyone gave him their attention. A few looked scared of him. At least until he smiled and said

"Hi! I'm Iruka Umino, and I'll be your instructor for the duration of your time at the academy. I'm sure we'll all be good friends. Now then, you guys introduce yourselves. Signal who you are when I call your name."

"Choji Akimichi."

"Here."

"Shino Aburame."

A boy wearing a coat and sunglasses raised his hand

"Shikamaru Nara."

Shikamaru just grunted

"Kiba Inuzuka."

"Yo…"

This went on until he reached the bottom of the list. \

"Naruto Mitarashi."

No one spoke.

"Naruto Mitarashi?"

"Going once, twice, gon…" He stopped when he noticed a black blob coming towards his window. The students saw this to and wondered what it was. Several knew it was not _what_ but _who_ it was. Tenten laid her head on her desk and murmured

"Please god no…"

And with that a boy burst in through the window. He rolled and landed smoothly in the middle of the class. He turned and skillfully threw two kunai, nailed a burgundy banner to the wall. It read:

_Introducing Naruto Mitarashi_

_Your future boss and/or lover._

The kid turned and the class looked at him. He was wearing a black trench coat, metal mesh shirt, and black pants. On his feet were black ninja sandals and a pair of metal shin protectors.

"Hey, what's up brats?" Naruto smirked

Most stared at him in disbelief. A few were openly. A pink haired girl in the front of the class stood up and pointed at him in outrage

"How dare you call us brats, you're no older than us and you're probably immatu…" A kunai grazed Sakura's cheek and Naruto walked to the back of the class and took his kunai and licked the blood from the blade. He then spit, the red loogie landing on Iruka's desk. The Haruno was speechless, and in shock.

"Your blood tastes worse than your forehead is big."

The girl looked like she was about to hit him, when Iruka walked up to him. She grinned, knowing that the instructor would take her side. And she was right. Utterly and completely right.

"Naruto Mitarashi?"

"Yup. What's up, Scarface?"

"GO SIT DOWN!"

"alright." He said back with a sarcastic grin.

He chose to sit next to Kiba, who was still in stitches, and Iruka walked back to the front of the class in a huff. After he gave them a pre-test to see how much they knew, he sat down behind his desk and opened a file cabinet. He pulled out the file of his new "favorite" student. Looking through he was a bit impressed. Training to be a shinobi since he was four, on good terms with several chunin, jounin, and even a couple ANBU, and then Iruka almost vomited when he saw the name and picture of the kid's mother. _ANKO was the kid's mom? I thought that outfit looked familiar. That psycho was training the demon brat? _He looked to where Naruto was dodging pencils thrown from Tenten. The Mitarashi saw him, smiled a huge sarcastic smile, and way over exaggerating the wave he sent Iruka. _Yup, that smart-alecky personality is definitely Anko's._ He put away the file closed the drawer, collected the pre-tests and turned to face the class.

"Alright, we're going to start with weapons training." He turned to write the names of ninja tools on the blackboard. He got to "_Shurik_" before a chalk eraser hit him on the back of the head. He turned on his students furious. Most looked horrified, but Kiba and Tenten were stifling laughs, Shikamaru, pretending to sleep, was unable to hide a small smile, and Naruto was sitting in his seat, feet on his desk, grinning completely unashamed.

**I know it's short, but the next one will be out in the next hour and a half. Reviews are appreciated.**


	6. The Incident

Chapter 6

Anko was on the ground laughing after she watched her son's antics and the classroom's reactions to them. Neither of them had really wanted him to go to the Academy, but the Hokage had insisted. This was just his way of protesting. She got up and watched Iruka scream at Naruto for throwing an eraser at him. Naruto just grinned and nodded. She wondered what he was saying. Naruto ended up on the floor rolling in laughter as Iruka went to the board as 3 more erasers pelted him.

_6 months later_

Iruka had long given up on making Naruto sit still in class. After the first week he had understood what was going on. Naruto knew all of the lessons already. He was bored. It didn't excuse his behavior, but whenever he punished him Naruto would just smile and say

"Alright, Scarface, how long is detention this time?"

Anko being his mom, he wasn't surprised at how violent and sadistic the kid was either. The incident with Sakura hadn't been the last. He'd now had incidents with, Sasuke Uchiha, Ino Yamanaka, and was getting ready to have a very brutal incident with a boy named Hikado.

Hikado was a Hyuuga and was very proud of that fact. And he hated Naruto with a passion. Hikado could understand the Uchiha being an exceptional shinobi, they pretty much all were, but this _freak _was higher than him in the rankings. The Uchiha and the Mitarashi had been battling for the top spot ever since their opening spar of the year had been a draw. One day Hikado came over to where Naruto, Sasuke and their friends were sitting.

"Hey, freak, who said you could eat in the same room with me?" Hikado spat.

"Look I don't speak jackass, so go bother someone else…jackass" Naruto rolled his eyes

Hikado's eyes were suddenly in flames and he said in a low tone

"You and your whore of a mother, think you're so damned wonderful don't you."

At "whore" Naruto suddenly got a cold look in his eyes and he stood up his chair smacking the floor. The lunchroom got quiet as the two boys stared.

"What'd you call my mom?" Naruto asked in a very low and monotone voice.

Hikado smirked thinking he had won. He had managed to rile up the sarcastic boy-wonder. He decided to twist the knife.

Iruka saw the two from the doorway. He also saw the look on Naruto's face and Hikado's grin. _Oh crap…_

Hikado began "A whor…" He never got to finish

Naruto came over the table with a kunai in his hand. He kicked Hikado in the throat and sent him flying into a pillar. He thrust the kunai, but his hand was grabbed and he was restrained by no less than 4 chunin. The kunai had been stopped less than an inch from Hikado's right eye. Iruka shivered when he saw the fury in Naruto's eyes. He didn't think Naruto would have killed Hikado, but he was sure about to blind him.

"Naruto I'm going to let you go, do you have control of yourself?" Iruka said slowly

"Yeah, I'm fine…" Naruto said curtly. The chunin let go of Naruto and the Mitarashi put the first kunai he had ever received in a slot up his sleeve. He walked away leaving a shaking Hikado, and a stunned cafeteria.

Naruto was sitting in the principal's office. He had gone there without having to be told, and sat in a chair in the corner, his trench coat hung on the back of the chair. The door opened and instead of the principal, Iruka and Anko walked through. Iruka looked at him and Naruto looked away. For once he was ashamed of himself.

"Naruto…" Anko said softly

The boy looked up and Anko punched him, knocking him to the floor. He got back up and looked at Anko, shame evident in his eyes.

"_What the hell happened, brat?"_ She shouted

Naruto just stayed silent

"_You damn near killed that kid you know that?"_

"He called you a whore!" Naruto shouted back, angry now

"So what?!" Anko yelled in his face.

"Mom, you saved me from the streets, and the people in them, I won't ever let anyone say something bad about you!" Naruto cried, tears beginning to form.

Iruka just sat quietly. He had never expected to see Naruto sad, let alone weeping. Anko slapped him hard across his face.

"Don't you understand what would have happened if Iruka hadn't stopped you?" Anko said in a more quiet voice.

"Yeah..." Naruto sobbed

Naruto fell to the floor. Anko stared at him for a minute before opening the door, leaving and slamming it behind her. Naruto was still on his knees sobbing. Iruka sighed and got out of the chair he had been in. He picked up Naruto and took back to the classroom, where, by now, class had been dismissed. Only Sasuke, Tenten, Kiba, and Shikamaru were there. Even though Naruto had clearly been crying they treated him as they always did and Naruto brightened up a bit. The whole group, including Iruka, left the Academy together, heading for Ichiraku Ramen.

The six friends were laughing and having a good time as Naruto downed his 21st bowl of miso that night. Even the Ichiraku's joined in. But when night finally came about an hour later the group parted. Naruto said goodbye to his friends who had helped him get over the incident at the Academy. He was heading across the rooftops for the Forest of Death, when he noticed several people following him. He stopped to face them, and then noticed they were all wearing masks. He stiffened and prepared to make a break for it, when four more appeared behind him. One of them shouted "Byakugan!" and the 7 Hyuuga descended on the student.

**NEXT CHAPTER SOON, SO I DON'T LEAVE YOU ON A CLIFFHANGER.**


	7. Anko's Rage

**I DON'T OWN NARUTO!**

Chapter 7: Anko's Rage

A full ANBU squad sprinted towards the sounds of the fighting. The silver haired squad captain abandoned caution when he saw the young shinobi lying on the ground. Naruto was missing nearly all of his teeth, was bleeding from multiple stab wounds and the tan trench coat, nearly identical to his mothers, and was stained black with blood. Kakashi checked Naruto's pulse, almost panicking when he felt how faint it was. He looked to his squad.

"Find the bastards who did this." He said quietly in a tone they knew all to well. Kakashi only got like this when he was pissed off enough to kill without hesitation. The silver haired ANBU then summoned his nin-dogs assigning an ANBU to each of them. After his squad and the hounds left he started rooftop jumping with all speed towards Konoha Shinobi Hospital. He didn't even bother coming in the front door. He kicked in a window that he knew was Saito Yakushi's, the chief of Konoha Medical Corps.

"Saito! This kid needs help right now!" Kakashi shouted. Seeing the condition of Naruto Saito immediately ran to the door and yelled for a gurney. He motioned for Kakashi to follow him and both started sprinting until they met the medical-nin squad with a gurney. Kakashi gently sat the boy down and watched has they disappeared into the operating room, a place he knew not to follow them into. The ANBU looked at his hands and armor. Both were red with the child's blood. He then started shaking. Not with fear, but with rage. Whoever did this was going to pay. Naruto had long since been able to tolerate the hazing that he received from the villagers, but he was on the verge of death because the idiots couldn't see the difference between the demon and the container. He saw a member of his ANBU squad running towards him. This was another of Naruto's friends. Cat AKA Yugao Uzuki.  
Both nodded and retreated to a dark room. AKA the nearest broom closet. Both removed their masks. And Kakashi saw Yugao's eyes were dead. Yugao looked into her squad leader's eyes and saw rage. Both knew that the one's responsible for this were going to die. Slowly and painfully if they had their way.

"I sent a message to Hayate, he's mobilizing more ANBU. The Hokage is royally pissed."

Hayate Gekko was Yugao's friend and lover. Kakashi knew they could trust him.

"There's something else. This was done by shinobi."

"Yeah, I figured. The poor kid could've defended himself if it were civilians."

Both ANBU then stood guard outside of the OR. Nobody, but nobody messed with a friend of the ANBU. And they knew this guy very well.

"WHERE IS HE?" He heard a woman scream down the hall

Yugao and Kakashi looked at each other and grinned under their masks. Both looked around the corner to see Anko lifting an unfortunate male medical-nin by his neck. The poor bastard had been the nearest to her when she'd come through a skylight.

"Anko!" Yugao yelled. The tokubetsu jounin looked and saw two of her friends. She could count the number of people she really trusted on two hands. Both of these people rated high on her list. She walked over and Yugao saw both rage and fear in her eyes. She knew how she felt. Naruto was the only person Anko loved. She hadn't been able to love since her first had abandoned her. She now dedicated her life to finding and killing that man.

The three shinobi waited together until the light stating that an operation was in session turned off. It was now dawn. The operation had taken 9 hours. Anko almost broke down when she saw all of the tubes and angry red marks running across her child's body. Several non-shinobi medical staff looked on disapprovingly when the demon brat was rolled out of the OR, with the chief medical-nin in tow. They turned around when the three shinobi which had guarded the room all night gave them a look that said _back off or die_. The three elites followed the gurney until Naruto was put in the intensive care unit. Kakashi then departed, saying he was going to check on the hunt. Yugao stayed saying she was going to stand watch. She stood in the corner of the room using a camouflage jutsu. Anko just slumped in a chair.

When Kakashi left, Saito Yakushi pulled him aside and gave him some very disturbing information.

"Dog, all of the kid's chakra points were blocked. Only one fighting style could have done that."

Kakashi's eyes widened when he realized at least one Hyuuga had attacked Naruto. And not a young one. His rage came flooding back. A higher ranked shinobi had attacked someone who wasn't even a genin yet. Albeit he was better equipped to deal with trouble than almost every one of his classmates. But it was still disgusting. Naruto would have had a better chance against a t-rex. He walked into a vacant room and jumped out of the open window.

There were now 5 full squads of ANBU scouring the Leaf Village for the attackers, and many of them knew Naruto through Anko, and knew he was a nice kid. So sixty very pissed-off elite shinobi were looking for the 7 Hyuugas, though the ANBU didn't know that they were Hyuugas. Kakashi was following his best tracker, Pakkun. Behind him were 2 squads of veteran ANBU Black Ops members. Pakkun had picked up the scent of the men immediately. Unsurprisingly all seven trails led to the Hyuuga compound. So now 84 elite shinobi were surrounding around two dozen chunin and jounin level shinobi. Kakashi sent messengers to both the hospital and the Hokage's mansion. The Hokage deliberated on whether or not to assault the compound. As much as he loved Naruto, a slaughter on his account may cause a riot. If he asked Hiashi Hyuuga, the leader of the Hyuuga clan, to hand over anyone who came in past the time Naruto was attacked. But he doubted that would happen. He huffed in frustration and called in Kakashi's messenger to tell him to open negotiations. Little did he know, the matter was about to be settled without his knowing.

Meanwhile Yugao had left two clones in Naruto's room and was making her way towards Kakashi's position. She had noticed the chakra signature of Anko following her, but chose to ignore it. Yugao arrived next to Kakashi, and Anko stopped about 100 meters away. The two ANBU figured she was just going to observe. Yugao had told her it was the Hyuuga who had attacked Naruto, so it was natural she would want to make sure it went well. An angry mother bear wouldn't be left out of the defense of her child. Then Anko's chakra signature disappeared.

In its place was a dark, corrupt, and almost _evil_ chakra. All of the ANBU present tensed. The evil force was coming closer at a rapid pace. On a six story building, next to the rooftop Kakashi was using as a command post, appeared Anko. She was emanating a purple haze, and half of her face had black flame tattoos. She had shed her usual outfit and was standing there in a set of black Torture and Interrogation Corps uniform. A sleeveless black shirt allowed them to see the tattoos that had extended down her arm also. An ANBU armor vest, along with black pants and shin guards completed the ensemble. She stood on the corner of the building, and stared at the Hyuuga compound. The guards had noticed the presence of the ANBU black ops and had posted themselves around the perimeter. Several of them noticed her, and actually backed up in fear. Anko lunged. One of the screamed and ran. The others prepared the guard against the attack. A certain silver haired ANBU attempted to grab Anko, but she simply swatted him away, breaking his mask with just a backhanded slap. And then she was on the guards. They never had a chance as the special operations jounin started tearing them apart. In seconds the dozen or so guards were lying on the ground dead or dying. A sloppily thrown kunai cut a deep gash in her arm and she screamed in pain and rage. She turned to the guard who had done it. It was the man who had fled before her in her initial charge. He turned to run again, before several kunai nailed him to the wall he had been standing by. Anko drew a katana she had previously not touched. It was a standard issue ANBU Torture and Interrogation Corps weapon. Not something to be underestimated. The crazed Anko jumped over the compound wall and killed another guard on impact. The razor sharp blade of the katana went straight through his Konoha chunin vest and cut open his heart. The few guards who were left were cowering before the monster before them. The servants had taken the children and fled out of the back gate, where they were whisked away by the ANBU Black Ops. Anko started advancing on the remaining men.

**_"ANKO!" _**A very gruff and angry voice shouted to her from outside the compound.

The Hokage stood on the rooftop command post, and looked down on the slaughter. The Hyuuga men had never had a prayer. Anko had stopped and was looking at him. The pure and undisguised killing intent and rage in her eyes was no surprise. The walls of the compound of were covered in blood where Anko had made her assault. She now stood looking back and forth between the few surviving Hyuuga men and the Hokage. The old man jumped and stood next to the enraged woman.

"Anko, Naruto is awake, he's fine." The Hokage put her hand on Anko's shoulder. The woman's face showed happiness, relief, and sadness all at the same time. The tattoos receded. The rage and killer intent left her eyes. Several ANBU came and restrained her. She didn't resist. The looked pleadingly at the Hokage.

"Take her to see her child before you take her to the cells." He ordered quietly

The four ANBU nodded and jumped away Anko in between them.

Everyone present looked around utterly horrified by the carnage. Anko had given no mercy to those who stood against her. The guards who stood against her were all dead. Even the ANBU were shocked by the utterly effortless massacre. Hiruzen Sarutobi, Sandaime Hokage, shook his head and walked away.

**ANKO WENT NUTS. Come on people you knew I couldn't pass up this chance. I told you there would be carnage people. You people know who you are. After the next 2 or 3 chapters there will be another time-skip. Another chapter tonight. **


	8. Among Friends

**I'm not Kishimoto, so no I don't own Naruto.**

**Enjoy : D**

**NOTICE! I'll be spending time posting longer chapters for this, and will be posting Naruto, Anko, and the ANBU daily. Expect Naruto Mitarashi around once or twice a week. Tell me what you think of this arrangment in the reviews k? K.**

Chapter 8: Anko's Lament

The four ANBU knew that they could trust Anko and offered her the opportunity the change her clothes and wash the blood from her arms. She refused and all five shinobi continued sprinting towards Naruto's room.

Iruka was standing next to the door ready to punch anyone who came in unannounced, when a tan blur flew past him.

"Mom?!" Naruto said in surprise. Anko punched Naruto hard enough to knock him out of the bed, and he looked at her about to shout, when she wrapped him in a bear hug. He relaxed and hugged her back, squeezing tightly.

"Don't ever scare me like that again, brat." Anko sobbed Naruto couldn't believe it. His _mom_ was _crying_.

"I won't mom."

"I love you squirt."

"I love you to mom."

The four ANBU left the room and stood outside to give the family privacy. Four medic-nin were about to tell Naruto to get back in bed when looks from two newly arrived ANBU told them to back off. These people were Anko's colleagues, and Naruto's friends. They wanted to give them as much time as possible together before they had to separate the boy and his mother. Yugao and Tiger AKA Tenzo (AKA Yamato) arrived through a window and sat quietly next to the door.

After about five minutes Tenzo cleared his throat.

"Anko, I'm sorry, but it's time to go."

"Alright, lets head to ANBU HQ."

"wha…"Naruto fell unconscious as he felt something impact the back of his head. Anko pulled her hand away from the back of her son's head and put him into his bed and covered him. She then stood between the four ANBU who had re-entered. Yugao removed her mask and looked in Anko's eyes

"Anko, while I can't condone your actions, I want to tell you I'll take care of Naruto while you're gone. I'll protect him with my life."

"I guess this means we aren't friends anymore?" anko said sadly.

Yugao wrapped up Anko

"Of course we are you moron."

Yugao let go and the four ANBU and Anko left the room. All that was left was Iruka and Yugao.

Iruka looked towards her and she looked back sadly.

It was around two days later when Anko awoke to find the Hokage in her cell with her. He wasn't wearing the Hokage's robes and she asked him what was going on.

"I'm stepping down as Hokage Anko."

Hiruzen put a hand up as Anko started to protest.

"Anko, I know you did what your instincts told you to do as a mother, and I respect that. An investigation carried out by Ibiki revealed that this was a plot by the Hyuuga in retaliation for Naruto's attack on Hikado. It's my fault that this wasn't revealed and so the entire incident is my fault."

The Sondaime once again had to silence Anko when she began to protest, but this time she kept on going. She wasn't about to let one of the few friends she had take the fall for her actions. Ironically it was the person she least expected to take her side who silenced her.

"Mitarashi-san that is enough. Hokage-sama has made his decision and you will respect it." Hiashi Hyuuga announced. Anko was struck dumb. The head of the family she'd just slaughtered like cattle a few days before, was telling her to let the Hokage take the fall, instead of punishing the culprit of a massacre?

"Excuse me Hiashi-sama, but why would you rather Hokage-sama take the fall than the culprit of the massacre?"

"Because the attack on your child was a disgrace." Hiashi said quietly.

"My child attacked Hikado."

"After Hikado insulted you. The boy was just defending his honor."

Anko was quiet. Hiashi Hyuuga was usually an arrogant asshole who strut around worse than the Uchiha used to. This was different. He was admitting that a member of the Hyuuga was wrong, and he deserved the beat down he got. In Anko's view Naruto was wrong, he had been about to at the very least relieve Hikado of his eyes.

"Goodbye Mitarashi-san." Hiashi turned and left the room

"You'll be released tomorrow when I resign." Hiruzen declared. Anko was about to begin her protest again, but felt something strike her in the neck. She fell unconscious and Jiraya looked down at her. He had used a teleportation jutsu to get into the cell during their argument.

"She turned out pretty well even, with Orochimaru's interference." Jiraya said

"Yes, and shes a very good mother." The Sondaime told his student

"The kid is just as psychotic as she is. I just saw him at the hospital and he was arguing with an ANBU about whether miso ramen or shrimp ramen was better!"

"What's psychotic about that?"

"Him and Cat were about to duke it out over the issue!"

"Little known fact: Yugao Uzuki's favorite food is ramen." The Hokage laughed loudly

"She has a figure like that and her favorite food is ramen." The Toad Sage looked skeptical

"Yeah, she has a secret. Somehow her and the other two sexiest kunoichi are able to stay skinny while eating dango, ramen, and drinking sake all the time."

"Sarutobi-sensei you're too old to be lusting after those three."

"Yeah, but Anko, Yugao, and Kurenai are so good looking." There was silence in the cell

Jiraya finally broke the silence.

"Wow Sarutobi-Sensei you're a perv…."

_Three Days Later_

Anko was wary of the looks she was getting as she walked through the streets of Konoha. She sighed. She deserved them this time though. Not to mention the Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi, took the fall for her actions.

_FLASHBACK_

_"Welcome, citizens of Konoha!" Hiruzen Sarutobi announced through a speaker. He waited for the cheers to die down before continuing_

_"I don't know how else to say it, and I don't want to bore you with a long speech so…" He paused until the laughter quieted down_

_"I'm stepping down as Hokage of Konohagakure, and Jiraya of the Sannin will be taking my place for the time being."_

_There was complete silence as the crowd digested what they just heard. _

_"I'll hand over the microphone to Jiraya so he can explain."_

_"As you all know there were several murders at the Hyuuga compound several days ago."_

_There were nods and various forms of agreement in the crowd._

_"Well Hiruzen-sensei is taking responsibility because of the fact that the attack was not unprovoked." There was shock throughout the crowd at that._

_"I can't reveal anymore than that, but in order to save lives Hiruzen Sarutobi-sensei has decided the step down."_

_The crowd roared in approval and if anyone thought that Hiruzen's approval rating couldn't have gone up they were wrong._

_FLASHBACK END_

Anko smiled a little bit at the fact that they had managed to make Sondaime-sama seem like a hero. She ended her thoughts on the matter when she entered the Yamanaka flower shop. She was looking at some orange flowers. To her orange flowers were downright offensive, but the brat liked orange, so here she was. Then she stiffened

"Yeah, the brat attacked the Hyuuga and the Hyuuga just took their revenge."

"So it's all him and his insane mother's fault that Sondaime-sama stepped down?"

"Yeah, I heard his mothers a lunat…"

He stopped when he felt cold steel at his throat.

"Who we talkin' 'bout?" Anko asked eagerly

"Uh, nobody, Mitarashi-san."

"I could have sworn you were bad mouthing my son."

"No, we were just talking about the incident that's all, and some people have an idiotic point of view."

"You don't feel like them do you?"

"Of course not Mitarashi-san."

"Cool, have a better one."

And with that Anko picked up an orange rose and went to the counter.

Ino Yamanaka was behind the counter looking bored, but she was surprised when she saw Anko Mitarashi enter the shop, and start looking at orange flowers. Then she felt a shiver run up her spine when she heard two villagers bad mouthing Naruto. She knew what was coming next. Anko had a quiet conversation with the two men and walked over to the counter with an orange rose in hand.

"I'll take this one." Anko said nonchalantly

Ino rang up the price and asked Anko for 100 ryo. She dug in her trench coat pocket and came out with a wad of bills. Not a roll. A wad. She peeled a 100 ryo note off of the ball and handed it to Ino. She then picked up her flower and was about to leave when she heard Ino call her

"Mitarashi-san?"

"Eh?"

"Could you take this over to Naruto to?" Ino handed her a white daffodil. Tied onto it in orange ribbon was a card with "Get better" emblazoned on the front.

"Why?" Anko asked, genuinely puzzled that a villager would want Naruto to feel better.

"Because he has friends, I just don't think he realizes that." Ino said sheepishly

"How did you know I was taking it to Naruto?"

"Who else would want an orange flower?" she got a bored look from Ino. Anko laughed and decided that was true. The tokujo (A/N Tokubetsu Jounin) took the daffodil and said she'd give it to him. She shot one more "_I'll kill you"_ smile at the men who had been talking about Naruto, and walked out of the shop. Ino could tell where Naruto got his personality from.

Anko was satisfied to see that Yugao was still guarding Naruto's room. And so were about a dozen other ANBU with a stance that said "_please mess with the kid so I can kill you." _ Then she was a bit surprised to find Kiba Inuzuka, his sister Hana, and their mother Tsume sitting in the room. Tsume gave a small wave at Anko who returned it with a smirk, so as not to wake up a sleeping Naruto.

"What are you guys doing here?" Anko whispered. She'd have expected Kiba, but not Hana and Tsume to. To answer her all three pointed to Naruto's wrist. On it was a bracelet made of a smaller version Inuzuka dog collar and hanging from the collar was a dog tooth on an inch long piece of shinobi wire. Anko opened her mouth in surprise and looked at Tsume, who just smiled and nodded. Naruto was now officially a friend, and therefore under the protection of, the Inuzuka Clan.

Tsume motioned for Anko to follow her outside. Kiba sat down next to his sister who just stroked her dogs watching the windows. Once outside the room Tsume and Anko sat down in a pair of chairs.

"So how'd my son become a friend of the Inuzuka?"

"Why shouldn't he be, Kiba likes him, so does Hana, and so do I. He's a bit of loose cannon, but then so are you and for that matter, most of the Inuzuka are to."

"Doesn't explain why you named him a friend of the Inuzuka."

Tsume sighed.

"Because a good kid like him doesn't deserve the treatment he gets. None of the Inuzuka have ever treated him badly, and neither have the Nara. But just about everyone else hates him."

"Because they're idiots…" A certain purple haired ANBU commented quietly. Tsume and Anko nodded in agreement with Yugao.

"Speaking of the Nara…" Anko pointed and Shikaku and Shikamaru were making their way towards Naruto's room. Shikamaru went inside with no trouble. Yugao knew him. Shikaku stopped and sat down next to the two kunoichi.

"So you finally did it Tsume?" He asked

"Yeah, did you bring yours?"

"Shika has it."

"Slow down I'm confused." Anko protested

"Go check out your son's wrist." Shikaku said

Anko poked her head in the door and Shikamaru was affixing a deer symbol on the wrist not covered by the Inuzuka collar. Anko once again was gaping. Two of Big Three clans of Konoha had named Naruto their friend. Not to mention the ANBU, Anko, and Naruto's own friends. Naruto practically had a billboard on his back now saying_ "Don't screw with me!" _because now there were around 250 clan shinobi who would stomp anyone who looked at Naruto funny. Whether they thought it was a drag or whether it would be fun to fang over fang the idiot who messed with him didn't matter. They would protect him. Even the Hyuuga would think twice before messing with that much firepower. Not to mention some were still cowering in fear after seeing what Anko was capable of if she so wished. Yeah, none of the shinobi in the immediate vicinity thought they'd have much to worry about.

Sasuke showed up with a book for Naruto. Anko was surprised that the Uchiha was here, but now that she thought about it, they did seem to hang out whenever she checked up on Naruto. In his hand was Ichiraku takeout. Anko watched in disbelief as the last Uchiha went around and handed each of the ANBU a bowl and they nodded their thanks before he went and sat down next to Naruto and started eating his own. He even shared it with Kiba. Shikamaru was offered some, but he refused. The ANBU took turns going into the nearest closet and wolfing down the ramen before returning to their post so the next Black Ops shinobi could eat.

Shikaku caught the look on Anko's face and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Anko, he has friends."

"Every ANBU shinobi here is a volunteer." Yugao agreed. An ANBU returning from eating his ramen stopped and said.

"This isn't everyone either, we have enough people that we can take four hours shifts around the clock." He said before walking on. Anko shook her head when she realized that added up to near a hundred ANBU who volunteered to guard Naruto. She looked at Tsume and Shikaku who just smiled. If Shikaku's mouth moving around a millimeter could be called a smile…

Anko grabbed the two clan heads and dragged them inside a vacant room, and wrapped both of them in a hug. Both were so surprised that they didn't move.

"Anko Mitarashi, notorious for being cold-hearted, hugging to people in public?" said a flat voice. All three turned to see a silver haired man in a jounin vest sitting on the window sill. He moved the _Icha Icha_ book and gave Anko an eye smile.

"I won't say anything."

Jiraya, not wearing the Hokage's robes, walked into the shinobi section of the hospital and was surprised to find enough firepower there to fight a small war.

_"Told the Old Man that the boy has friends he doesn't know about."_ The Godaime Hokage mused.

The Sondaime himself walked in behind Jiraya. He was wearing dark blue robes and nodded to the shinobi in the room who snapped to attention in the presence of their Hokage (-s?). Even those in bed tried to sit up a little straighter. The two men strode into Naruto's room and weren't surprised to find shinobi in there to. Hana and Kiba stood up at attention. Kiba wasn't required to do so as he was an Academy student, but it seemed like the right thing to do. The Godaime Hokage told them to sit down with a grin. He wasn't used to people snapping to when he was around. The Sondaime was almost laughing at Shikamaru, comatose on the floor. He was in for quite a surprise if he woke up in the next five minutes. Jiraya and the Sondaime looked to a medic-nin who walked.

"Report on his condition?" the Sondaime asked

"Yes, Sondaime-sama, Naruto Uzumaki appears to be healing quickly. The Medical Chief assumes this is a result of his, eh, condition."

The Godaime and Sondaime both nodded. Both Hokage stuck around for around ten minutes before leaving. The Godaime had to go do paperwork and Sondaime had to go make fun of the Godaime for doing the paperwork he had so dreaded, and to see if he figured out the secret to doing it.

_5 hours later.(7:30 PM)_

Hana was about to fall asleep herself when Naruto's eyes fluttered open. She stood up and yelled for a medic, who came running in. Around half a second later Anko, Tsume, and 2 ANBU were peering in the door as well. All were relieved to see that Naruto was awake. The boy hadn't woken up since Anko knocked him out several days before, and the medics had been a bit worried. Much to everyone's surprise Naruto got out of bed as if he hadn't been beaten nearly to death, and then been in a coma for the last few days. The first thing he did was hug Anko. She returned it. No tears this time, but she felt sorry that she had knocked him out when she had left to get locked up.

"Mom what are these?" He asked holding up his wrist.

"Those are the emblems of the Inuzuka and Nara clans. They mean that they are your friends and you are under their protection, now get back in bed you idiot."

Naruto obeyed and Tsume and Shikaku entered the room, an ANBU closed the door behind them after a doctor had entered. The doctor checked Naruto's vitals and announced that he was perfectly healthy (after checking his instruments five times and doing the check up over again.), and could probably leave in the morning.

After the medic-nin left Anko pointed to Tsume and Shikaku.

"This is Tsume Inuzuka, and this is Shikaku Nara, they are the heads of their clans and the ones who made the decision to allow you to become a friend of their families."

Naruto nodded

"Thank you…" He didn't know what else to say. Suddenly Anko got an idea.

"I'll be back in like half an hour squirt." She looked at Tsume and Shikaku.

"Don't leave until I come back." They nodded and wondered what was going on.

There was a commotion out in the hall and a doctor very nearly had hand impaled by a kunai. _So Tenten's here_ Naruto thought. The Higurashi girl burst in. She was wearing a sleeveless black shirt, black pants and a pair of black ninja sandals. Ever since she had started hanging out with Naruto and Anko her fashion sense had done a one-eighty. She jumped on Naruto's bed and hugged him. Naruto blushed and the two adults laughed out loud. Even Sasuke smirked a little bit. Kiba mumbled that Naruto had all the luck. Shikamaru woke up and looked at his two friends on the bed.

"Women are such a drag…" he mumbled and he fell backwards again. In less than thirty seconds snoring could be heard.

"Naruto-kun I'm so glad you're ok."

"Uh, yeah, me to Tenten."

_She looks good in black, wait what?_

"How are you feeling?" she asked worried.

"I'm fine."

"Bullshit…" Tenten pulled a knife and put it close to his family jewels. "Don't lie." She narrowed her eyes.

"I'm not lying and you've been hanging out with my mom too much."

"Are you implying that I'm psychotic?" She said moving the kunai closer to him.

"No, but if you moved away the knife you'd make me feel a lot better."

She suddenly smiled and put away the kunai.

"I really am glad you're ok, Naruto."

"Me to ten-chan" he finally hugged his best friend back.

"Ahem…" Anko cleared her throat. She was standing on the balcony of Naruto's room. Tenten climbed off the bed, when Anko began staring at her. Everyone else in the room simply looked at what was in her hand. The box was marked with a snake fang.

"Now pay attention everyone, these are my personal possessions, but I decided that you guys each need one for this occasion. She pulled a table from the side of Naruto's bed to the center of the room, and sat the box on it. It was about the size of a shoebox and everyone was curious as to what was inside it.

"The box isn't anything special, I just painted a shoebox black and stenciled a white fang on it." Anko grinned

Everyone rolled their eyes and smirked. That sounded like Anko alright. But when she opened the box they looked a little shocked. Inside there were ten necklaces identical to Anko's and Naruto's. Anko pulled one out so they could see. It was a snake fang tied with a piece of string. To everyone around the string looked weak.

"The string may look weak but it's full of chakra so it'll be fine." She took two and put them around Shikaku's and Tsume's necks. She did the same for Yugao who had come in to see what the commotion was about. She gave one to Sasuke who looked curious. Everyone in the room, even the children, got one of the necklaces. There were three of them left after Kakashi received his.

"These mark you as friends of the Mitarashi Clan," Anko grinned "there may only be two of us, but we'll kick anyone's ass who messes with you guys."

Everyone smiled at Anko's spur of the moment decision.

"Now guys there are only twelve of these in the whole world, me and Naruto have ours, you guys have yours, and when the Sondaime and Ero-Godaime get theirs there will only be one left in the case, you guys were all here for us when we needed you, so you only need to ask and you know we'll be there." Everyone smiled at her and she smiled back. It had been a good day all around.

**REVIEWS ARE APPRECIATED.**


	9. Graduation

**I DONT OWN NARUTO.**

**I have posted an extra long chapter. In return I demand chocolate chip pancakes.**

**Enjoy : D**

Chapter 9:Graduation

_Another time skip guys. A rather large one this time to. We're skipping three years of Naruto's Academy career. It's about a week before graduation and Naruto and Sasuke are still battling for the top spot in the class as they have been since day one. After he was placed under the protection of the Inuzuka Clan as well as the Nara, he actually had a relatively normal Academy career. Except for when Iruka discovered tacks in his chair or a box of ground of pink chalk in the door. Then things get hectic. Bu The fact that Hikado was in the hospital for two weeks after his "fight" with Naruto, convinced most people not to piss him off. We're going to join Naruto and company at lunch at Ichiraku, after ditching school. Let's see how this one turns out shall we?_

"Hey, Shika, you got the bill right? Thanks buddy…" Naruto said quickly

"Naruto you're a drag sometimes you know that?" Shikamaru complained

"Will you two morons stop arguing and pay the bill, I want to browse some weapons shops before we get caught." Tenten ordered. Sasuke grunted his agreement.

"I don't know about you guys, but me and Akamaru are gonna go and hide so we aren't murdered."

"Too late brats…"

Naruto went pale as he felt his mother's arm slide across his shoulder. He turned slowly to see her _I'm gonna kill you grin._

"_SCATTER!_" Tenten shouted. The other students ran leaving Naruto to deal with his mother

"Hey wai…oh thanks guys!" Naruto turned back to his mom rearing back for a punch "_Not the face!"_ And then he saw stars.

Iruka turned to a tapping on the window and saw Anko holding her students over her shoulder. He opened the window, and Anko dumped Sasuke, Kiba, Shikamaru, Naruto, and Tenten at his feet. All of them were unconscious.

"I found some little lost students, so I figured I'd bring'em back here." She said evenly

"Thanks Anko."

"No probs. Oh and Iruka?"

"Yeah?"

"Watch your students better." She slammed the window shut and jumped away

The bell rang and all of the students ran out. Naruto and his friends were still unconscious on the floor. Iruka sighed, _I'll probably just let them off the hook, it was Anko that found them. I wonder if they have amnesia as a result of brain trauma._

Naruto groggily got up.

"It had to be Mom that found us…"

Iruka laughed at Naruto and drew a glare.

"What's so funny?"

"The fact that you two are so alike!"

"My mom's psychotic." Naruto pointed out

"Yea, and so are you." Iruka smiled

"Am not." Naruto grumbled

"Are to."

"Not…

"To..."

"Will you be quiet, jeez you're his sensei, and you're arguing like a couple of teenagers." A woman's voice said from the doorway.

"And if I'm not mistaken you both called me psychotic…" Anko gave them a sadistic grin.

"Why are you back so quickly?"

"Oh, I came to grab the brat since school is out, I'll punish him in my own way, come on squirt Izumo and Kotetsu are ready to start counting your laps."Anko smiled

"Aw maaaan…." But he walked over to his mother. She put him in a headlock and started running her fist across his head

"MOTHERLY NOOGIE OF VENGEANCE!"

"For what?!"

"Calling me psychotic…" She released him and the two Mitarashis jumped toward the main gate.

Iruka started laughing at their antics, and wondered why he wasn't more friendly with Anko. Then he looked at the still unconscious children and remembered exactly why.

_3 Hours Later- Main Gate_

"One thousand. Alright Naruto you can stop now." Kotetsu shouted. Naruto walked over panting. Izumo laughed at him as the boy sat down. He'd hung out with the two chunin enough that they looked on him as a kind of little brother.

"That's what you get for skipping class, Naruto." He handed Naruto his trench coat and a bottle of water from inside the booth. He took a large gulp and showed the two gate guards his sandals. It had metal covering the toes and heel.

"They give me a bit more wallop in my kicks. Same thing with my gloves see," He held up a fingerless glove and there was metal across the knuckles. ", only problem is that they begin to get heavy when I'm on a long run like that."

Izumo looked at him strangely as did Kotetsu.

"What?" Naruto stared back

"Why hasn't anyone else done that…" Kotetsu asked

"Because my son's awesome and damn near everyone else sucks." Anko strolled up grinning. Izumo and Kotetsu laughed and agreed. The fox kid had grown on them after all. Naruto stuffed the bottoms of his black pants back into his sandals and put on his coat.

"Ready to go home?" He asked

"Yup let's head." Anko turned and jumped away toward the Forest of Death, Naruto following close behind.

_Several Days Later_

"The exam will consist of a spar with a classmate, a written test and a test of your jutsu." Iruka announced.

"First we'll be sparring, so let's go outside." He walked out the door while the class got up and followed him.

"The first two are Sakura Haruno vs Kiba Inuzuka." The class rooted for their respective friends, and then the fight was over with Sakura unconscious after around ten seconds.

_That was about what I expected…_Iruka mused

"Next up is Tenten Higurashi vs Jenka Fukuoka." The two fighters stepped forward. This fight didn't last long either with the weapons expert nailing Jenka to a tree by his clothes.

"Naruto Uzumaki vs Sasuke Uchiha." This time the crowd really got loud. The two friends were recognized as the best in the class at taijutsu. Both took up their stances. Naruto's Hebi style against the Uchiha Interceptor style.

"Begin!" The fight began and both contestants started circling the other. Then they both lunged. Naruto landed the first hit with a solid punch to Sasuke's abdomen, but didn't get away from Sasuke's counter to his kneecap. Both slid backwards, before jumping again. This time Naruto got off a left hook to Sasuke's face and the Uchiha was sent tumbling to ground. Sasuke spun and kicked Naruto's feet out from under him. While falling Naruto stuck out his hands back flipped out of range. While Sasuke was recovering he sprinted forward and delivered a kick to Sasuke's back. The Uchiha fell to the ground and raised his hand signaling he was finished. Iruka checked Naruto's name and Sasuke's saying they both passed the spar. The class was cheering or booing whichever side they were on. Naruto leaned down to help his friend up. Sasuke gave Naruto a small smile, and said

"Cheap shot…"

"Yeah, it was, let's clear off so they can get started on the next fight." Naruto laughed

The next fights passed normally with Shikamaru winning his fight by pinning his opponent with a Shadow Possession. Chouji lost his to Ino after she offered a bag of BBQ chips.

The written test was a written test, nothing special.

Then came the jutsu exam.

"Naruto Uzumaki!" Iruka called out

"Alright you'll be performing three jutsu. A transformation, a clone jutsu, and a substitution."

"Alright, that's easy. Oh wait, can I do _any_ clone jutsu?"

"Sure…"

Naruto transformed into the Anko that he'd shown Izumo and Kotetsu when he'd first mastered it. Iruka chuckled as did Mizuki and he substituted himself with one of the logs in the room placed there for that purpose. Then came the clone jutsu.

"Shadow Clone Jutsu!"

The two chunin stood up as four perfect replications of Naruto stood before them.

_"Where'd you learn that?!" _Iruka shouted

"Trade secret." Naruto grinned

_Meaning Anko…_

"Very well Naruto, you pass." He tossed Naruto a headband which the genin proudly tied around his head. He walked out and past his classmates in line. He sat down in class and was relieved to see that all of his friends had passed as well. The Academy walked outside together, to find their parents outside.

"Alright, squirt!" Anko ruffled. Naruto smiled back at his adoptive mother, who grinned at him.

"I can't believe they let that boy become a shinobi…" A woman mumbled. Anko turned on them and stared coldly

"Have a problem with my kid being able to kick your ass?" Anko sneered

"He has that _thing_ inside of him!"

"AND," Anko roared ", CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A DEMON AND THE CONTAINER YOU DUMBASS?!" She actually drew a kunai before Naruto stopped her.

"Mom, forget it, let's go." Anko sneered at the terrified woman one more time before jumping away with her son. Then once they were out of sight Anko turned around and threw a punch at Naruto. He blocked it and kicked at his mom's kidney. They both grinned and started fighting while they were jumping across the rooftops.

On top of the Hokage's tower sat an ANBU. Next to her was a jounin. A couple more shinobi walked up and watched the two silhouettes throwing punches and kicks. None of them moved. They'd long stopped intervening when the Mitarashis were celebrating.

_Later that night_

Naruto was walking through Konoha with a bag of dango in his hand. It had been his mom's turn to pick dinner, and he was on his way to pick up the sake before heading home. He was walking past the Hokages tower when he spotted movement on the side of the tower. He stopped and looked up to see Mizuki crawling in the window. He made a clone and gave it the dango and sent it to go tell Anko. He then crouched in an alley waiting for Mizuki to return. When he did he had a large scroll slung horizontally at his waist. Naruto now suspicious decided to follow the chunin. Before long Mizuki had made it into the forest, and was heading north at steady pace. Naruto was wondering where he was headed when pain exploded in the side of his head. His body slammed into a large oak tree and he looked up to see Mizuki standing in a tree, smirking.

"You think I didn't notice you, you little snot?" He sneered

"I guess I over-estimated your stupidity…" Naruto smirked back at him

"In case you haven't noticed, now isn't the time for smart ass remarks, because now you have to die." Mizuki laughed at him

"Well then let's dance traitor." Naruto grinned sadistically.

"Are you kidding, I'll destroy you!" the traitorous chunin laughed manically.

"Yeah, but when the ANBU show up, you're screwed." Naruto laughed at the look of shock on Mizuki's face.

"Come on I'm not as dumb as you are Mizuki, do you really think I'd come out here without notifying someone else." He stopped laughing when Mizuki removed a large shuriken from a rack on his back.

"Die you little brat!" He threw the shuriken. Naruto's eyes widened when he realized that he wouldn't be able to dodge in time.

"NARUTO, GET DOWN!"

Naruto ducked and felt blood spray onto him. He turned over and opened his eyes to see Anko's face contorted into one of pain.

"Mom…" he whispered

"You dumbass, you came out here alone?" Anko scolded her voice weak.

"Why'd you save me?" Naruto whispered back, as if it was unnatural for Anko to save him.

"Because you're my kid you moron. Why wouldn't I sacrifice myself for someone I love?" Anko grinned a little bit, before passing out. Naruto moved out from under his mother and removed the shuriken from her back. He tore off a piece of his coat and wrapped it around her back. Then he stood up still holding the shuriken. The air had suddenly gotten cold.

"You'll pay for this…" Naruto's voice sounded menacing.

"I'll kill you!" He screamed and threw the shuriken. Mizuki was in such shock from the feeling he was getting that he barely dodged the shuriken. He lost his footing and fell from the branch. He looked to Naruto once more. His hair had become messy and feral. The boy's nails had turned into claws, while his canines became razor sharp and the whiskers on his face became much more pronounced. The worst part was his eyes. They were red and had no feeling besides rage in them. Complete and utter rage. The type of rage that allowed a person to kill without thought. Naruto delivered a kick to Mizuki's stomach which sent him flying into a nearby tree. The force was so great that it splintered from the impact. Naruto started sprinting after the traitor. This time he had a kunai in hand. He raised it to finish off the unconscious chunin. Just as he was about the stab, a hand grabbed his wrist in an iron grip. He turned to find Kakashi standing there a squad of chunin behind him.

"It's over now Naruto. Mizuki's disabled, if you want revenge, let the Torture and Interrogation Corps take it for you." Kakashi said in his usual monotone voice.

"Yeah, squirt let me take my own revenge out on the bastard." A feminine voice yelled out Naruto immediately calmed at the sound of his mother's voice. He dropped the kunai and Kakashi let go of his hand.

"You alright, Naruto?" Kakashi sounded like he actually cared for once

"Yeah I'm fine Dogface." Naruto grinned

"I don't even wear that mask anymore, and yet you insist." Kakashi sighed

"Aw, come on Dogface you could be called worse things. Like pervert for example." Anko yelled out while the ANBU medic treated her wound.

"Don't call me Dogface."

", But it has a ring to it, Dogface." One of the ANBU commented

"Oh my god…is that my new name."

"Uh huh…" a few people said in unison.

"Well you guys seem to have things under control here. I'll take the scroll back to the Hokage's tower. Bye now…" the masked shinobi picked up the scroll and body flickered away. The ANBU medic helped Anko up and the two Mitarashis gave their report to the squad leader, who deliver it to the Hokage.

"Alright. Later Anko, bye Naruto."

"See ya Tiger." They said in unison as the ANBU squad left with Mizuki.

"Alright then, that clone left the dango on the table, so let's get home before it gets cold."

"Gotta hurry!" Naruto warned

"Race ya." And Anko took off.

"No fair dude!" and the blonde took off after his mom

_Next Day_

"Team Seven will be Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha, and Tenten Higurashi." Sakura cheered that she was on Sasuke's team. While Sasuke and Tenten were just glad that they were on the same team."

Iruka went through the team assignments, and said

"Ok, your Jounin senseis should be here shortly. It's been nice teaching you guys, it really has been. See ya round!" The chunin said with a smile.

"Hey sensei!" Kiba yelled out

"Huh? What is it Kiba?"

"What about Naruto. You never called his name." Kiba pointed out

"Oh, Naruto has been apprenticed to someone, so he won't be joining a squad." Iruka said with a little pride that his student had been taken on as an apprentice.

"Huh? Why does Naruto get to be an apprentice, but not Sasuke!? Sasuke is a million times better than Naruto! Who would take on that idiot as an apprentice anyway?" Sakura shouted this out as if Naruto had murdered a puppy.

"Sakura, number one: Sasuke and Naruto competed for top spot the entire four years they were here. Number two: Naruto and Sasuke are good friends who agree that they're equals. And to answer your third question, it was Anko Mitarashi who took on Naruto as an apprentice, and he isn't an idiot. He outdid your score in everything, but bookwork." Iruka said matter-of-factly

"Oh, so his mom gave him special treatment. What does she do? Guard the kitchen or something?" Sakura yelled out. This time Sasuke turned to Sakura.

"Sakura, Naruto got an apprenticeship because he deserves one. And his mother is a special operations jounin who specializes in assassination, torture, and strikes deep inside enemy territory, so if would shut up and stop embarrassing yourself I'd appreciate it." He said in a monotone voice

"Oh…" Sakura sat down and looked like someone had told her that her goldfish had gotten flushed when it was still alive.

"Now that that's over with, I'll see you guys later." Iruka smiled and left the room.

_Two Hours Later_

_"_I can't believe our sensei hasn't shown up yet!"

"So what do you think Naruto is doing right now?" Tenten asked Sasuke

"He's probably getting instruction in some kind of assassination technique."

"Yeah…"

_With Anko and Naruto_

"GO!" Anko shouted. The two shinobi picked up their weapons and turned to their targets. And then started feeding the noodles into their mouths. Naruto slammed down his chopsticks and stood up, arms raised in victory.

"I am the victor of the ramen eating contest!" He shouted out. Anko sighed,

"Alright as per the agreement, I'll do the dishes tonight."

"Now then, are you ready for your first training session?" Anko grinned

"Hell yeah! Let's go!" Naruto shouted. Anko laughed and they jumped away to Training Ground 44.

"Ok, squirt, I'm supposed to ask you your hopes, dreams ,dislikes and likes, and what your skills are, but I since I know all that let's just get right into it. I'm going to be training you in assassination. It's my specialty as well as torture, but I don't think you're ready for that one yet, so we're going to be doing assassination for now. I know you know what assassination entails, but why don't you jog my memory?"

"Assassination is a type of mission where the shinobi who takes it on is assigned a target that he or she must kill. There are different types of assassinations as well. For example an assassination designed to strike fear might be done in a particularly gruesome way, or a political assassination would be done in public to undermine one's political authority. Lastly there is the black ops assassination. In this situation it is preferred that the target be killed stealthily because of the fact that anyone who witnesses the death or the shinobi doing it, must be killed regardless of age, gender, or social status."

"Good. Now then what is the advantage of assassination over direct combat?"

"Assassination is usually carried out against enemy leaders. Political figures, high ranking commanders, etc. Without these people to command them an army will often fall into disarray. Therefore an assassination can disable an entire army."

"Ok, you seem to have grasped it pretty well. I have a course set up in the basement of the tower . There are a few genin, and chunin in there. Your target is suspected to be in the center of the complex, kill him, I'll be watching on the monitors. See ya."

Naruto looked towards the tower a few yards away. Multiple entry points, but only one entry point to the basement. Once inside he knew the layout of the basement. He ran towards the tower stopping to use a transformation before heading in. He turned right upon entering and walked down a few flights of stairs into the tower's basement. A kunai flew past him and struck the wall

"Hey asshole! Watch where you're throwing those damn things or I'll castrate you and hang'em from the Yondaime's nose!" His voice came out feminine but very pissed off.

"Oh sorry, Anko! I thought Naruto might have been dumb enough to walk straight down the steps." A chunin was guarding the door to the rest of the basement.

"You calling my kid stupid?" "Anko" asked

"Uh, no."

"I think you just called him dumb…"

"No I didn't I was just saying…"

"Just get the hell out before I feed you to my snakes."

"Yes ma'am…" the chunin about pissed himself as he ran up the stairs and out of the Forest of Death.

Naruto almost laughed at how scared people were of his mom, but he didn't want to seem out of character. Then he saw the next guard and he knew he was screwed. Genma Shiranui, another Tokubetsu Jounin was standing at the next door. He was chewing on his senbon and if the way he was smirking at Naruto was any clue, he already knew that this wasn't Anko.

"What are you staring at? If you like just come out and say so…" "Anko" shouted down the hallway.

"Yeah, ok, Naruto…head back to the start." Said in a flat tone

"Damn," Naruto released the transformation. "how'd you know it was me?"

"I didn't, I just bluffed." Genma smirked

"…"

"Don't be a sore loser, just head on back outside. Good job making the chunin piss his pants though." Genma was an ass, but he had to respect the kid for being able to bluff an experienced chunin. His disguise had been too obvious though. Naruto had his hands in his pockets when he walked out. He received a punch to the back of the head from Anko.

"Ok I deserved that…" he admitted

"Brat, you got caught almost immediately, let me show you how you're supposed to do it, go up to the monitor room and watch your mom do her job…" Anko grinned

Naruto complied and jumped from window sill to window sill until he reached the top floor. He climbed inside and walked a few doors down to a dark room. He put a pair of headphones on, and listened in as he watched the cameras. On one of the screens he saw the chunin he had scared off re-enter and talk to Genma.

"Did Anko come through here?"

"That wasn't Anko that was Naruto…" Genma answered tiredly

"You're kidding right…I got the piss scared out of me by a thirteen year old?" The man's face was incredulous

"Yeah, you did. But I bluffed him and he released the transformation." Genma smirked

"At least it took a tokujo to catch him."

"Yeah, hey Anko is probably starting the next one soon, so I'll take this door, you go ahead farther in."

"Yeah, ok. See ya later Genma."

"Later."

At that moment Naruto had an idea. He got up and made his way to the ground floor. He transformed himself, made a clone, and walked in. He started laughing as he walked down the stairs.

"Don't let Naruto bitch you out again. It's like you think I'd kill you or something…" He pointed to the now transformed clone.

"Yes, Anko, you would…" the chunin lookalike answered dryly

"Yeah, I probably would, but don't let him scare you like that, god…" He saw Genma staring at them wide eyed.

"What?" He demanded

"Kaido…just walked past."

"You're kidding me! The squirt fooled you with a transformation!" He said in mock incredulity. Genma simply nodded and turned to run after who he thought was Naruto. Instead he felt a strike on the back of his head and he cursed before blacking out. Naruto now transformed into Genma and sprinted down the hallway towards his target. He shouted out

"Kaido, Anko is up front asking for you!"

The transformed Anko turned and said

"What?"

"Anko is up front and wants to see you."

"Ugh…great…" But the chunin lookalike ran off towards the front, Anko not wanting to blow her cover. "Genma" smirked and walked inside to see the Sondaime sitting there, his back to the assassin.

"Hokage-sama?!"

"Yes, what is it, Genma?"

Naruto smirked and walked up behind Sarutobi. He put a kunai to the Hokage's throat.

"You're dead…"

Hiruzen laughed

"Ok, Naruto, I'm supposed to play the part. OH THE PAIN, OH!" and the Hokage laid his head down as if he were dead. Naruto laughed at the old man's antics. Anko came sprinting in, panting.

"Damn, squirt, you got'em…"

Naruto grinned

",But you still suck. If you had been on mission the first time, you'd be dead." His mother/sensei scolded

The grin vanished.

"So we need to work on your stealth. We also need to teach you about entry points, as well as getting you some assassination equipment." Anko smiled

"Still not bad for the first time brat, now let's go. Thanks for playing old man."

"It got me away from paperwork Anko-chan. I was more than happy to help." The Hokage smiled a grandpa smile at the Mitarashis, glad that the two village psychos had found each other that night.

_6:30 PM Dangoya_

They arrived at the dango stand from the Forest of Death around thirty minutes later, and they were surprised to see the rookies and the jounin were both in the place. In different booths of course. Naruto stopped to sit down next to his friends, but Anko grabbed collar of his trench coat and dragged him to the jounin booth. She threw him in next to Kakashi, who had moved over to make space for the Mitarashis.

"So how'd the kid do?" Asuma was curious

"Ask Genma…"Anko smirked a little. Everyone turned to the male tokujo in the corner of the booth. He was nursing a large welt on the back of his head. Seeing everyone, but Naruto and Anko looking at him curiously, he flushed a little bit and smirked.

"The brat used a transformation and knocked me out when I wasn't looking."

The other jounin all began laughing at that. The Hokage's personal guard, got his ass handed to him by a genin.

"Told you the kid was awesome." A certain chunin shouted from a table a few booths away.

"Shut up Izumo, don't you have a gate to guard?" Genma yelled back

"Low blow, Genma…" Izumo started sulking. Naruto suddenly had an idea.

"Genma, will you forgive me for embarrassing you in front of everyone if I buy the next round." Naruto grinned a little bit

"Ok, kid, you are officially on my list of guys who I can drink with!" A purple haired kunoichi shouted

"Oh like hell Yugao! Hayate warned me about you! I go drinking with you, and I'd be broke!" Naruto laughed

"Aw come on squirt…" Anko wrapped her arm around the blonde's neck.

"Fine, Yugao, Izumo, come over here, if I'm going to buy a bottle for everybody I'm not buying one for each table. Waiter, extra large bottle of sake!"

Meanwhile the rookies were staring in wonder at Naruto. He was talking to the jounin and chunin like they were friends (A/N remember that they are indeed friends because of Anko.) Sakura snorted

"They're just using him to get their sake. How pathetic, they aren't really his friends." She stopped talking trash when she felt a pair of eyes boring into her. The purple haired kunoichi who'd spoken earlier sauntered over while they waited for their sake to arrive.

"What's your name, bubble gum?" She asked casually

"Sakura Haruno." The fangirl answered simply.

"Ok Haruno, I'll let you in on a secret. Naruto is like a little brother to me and damn near every other jounin and ANBU in the village. How do you think he got as good as he is? Hang out with experienced ninja and you start picking things up. Naruto is a kind person and would gladly die to save any of his friends. We feel the same for him. Now shut your mouth. Genma there is the squirt's friend to, and he isn't as nice as I am. Tootles." Yugao patted the stunned genin's head and returned to where the other shinobi in the group were holding their sides laughing at Sakura's expression.

"YUGAO-SAN YOU EXTINGUISHED HARUNO-SAN'S YOUTH QUITE EFFECTIVELY, I CONGRATULATE YOU IN YOUR DEFENDING OUR YOUNG FRIEND!" Maito Gai screamed at the top of his lungs. The other shinobi covered their ears and rolled their eyes in irritation, but forgave the loudmouth when the sake arrived. Naruto got up to leave, but felt someone grab his arm. He turned to see Genma holding his wrist.

"Nope. You ain't leaving until we give you a nickname besides squirt or kid." Genma smirked

Naruto sighed and sat back down. A bowl of sake was pushed over to him and he groaned. But his mom grabbed his hair and forced him to drink the rice wine. He coughed, but started laughing at his mom.

"Aren't you supposed to tell me not to drink?" He joked

"Yeah, but considering you're old enough to kill, you're old enough to drink." She poured another shot for him and pushed it over.

_3 Hours Later_

"How about Psycho Two?" Kakashi suggested. Asuma shook his head.

"How about the amazing god of genin Mitarashi Naruto." Naruto threw it out there while his head was on the table

"Noooo…to flashy." Genma hiccupped.

"I still like brat." Anko drunkenly laughed. Naruto scowled and said

"Ok, how about a nickname for Anko. I suggest Bitchpants Mccrabby." He ducked a punch and slid to the side of the booth where his mom couldn't reach. Asuma laughed and raised his hand

"I second that motion."

"Very well the motion to call Anko 'Bitchpants Mccrabby' is on the floor. All in favor?"

"Aye!" a large chorus called out

"Against?"

"Nay!" Anko shouted

"The ayes have it. Anko Mitarashi is henceforth christened Bitchpants Mccrabby" Genma declared.

"Oh I got one! How about Mini-Psycho!" Yugao yelled out

"Approved. Naruto Mitarashi is christened Mini-Psycho." Genma stated. The two Mitarashis were incredulous, and soon everyone in the booth had a horrible nickname. Kakashi was declared Scarecrow, Asuma was Cancer Statistic. Yugao was now Grape. Gai was Acorn (Kool kids will get that one), and Genma was toothpick. Soon after they all stumbled out of the dango shop. Naruto and Anko were leaning on each other, both being barely conscious. They made it about halfway to the Forest of Death before Naruto collapsed on a park bench and Anko fell under the bench. Both were snoring before they hit the dirt.

**Reviews are appreciated. Finals are over, so I'll be posting a bunch tomorrow. Goodnight everyone, or good morning or what have you.**


	10. First Mission

**SORRY FOR THE DELAY. WRITERS BLOCK SUCKS! btw hammers and drills don't cure writers block, they only cause severe head trauma. Or so my doctor says I think they worked fine.**

**NO I DON'T OWN NARUTO I THOUGHT WE'D GONE OVER THIS!**

**Enjoy : D**

Chapter 11: First Mission

_For the next three months while the rest of the teams were doing their D-Ranks, and getting genin life out of the way, Anko and Naruto trained every day. She taught him everything from advanced Hebi style to how to use senbon to incapacitate an enemy without killing. But most of their time was spent on assassination and sabotage training. Today Anko and Naruto will be taking their first mission._

The chunin got off the ground from where Naruto had knocked them out, when he fell from the vent. His target was "dead" and the exercise was over. Anko came in clapping

"Good job, squirt. Now let's go." His mother grinned

"Where to?" Naruto looked at her quizzically

"Hokage's tower. We're getting our first mission today."

"Ugh, what is it painting a fence? Catching a cat?" Naruto groaned

"No, I'm not taking anything below C-Rank." Anko continued grinning.

"Should have known that." Naruto laughed and the Mitarashis left the tower.

_Hokage's Tower_ _10:00 A.M._

"Hey, Ero-Hokage! We're here for our first mission!" Anko shouted as she entered the office used to deliver missions. Naruto followed behind her twirling a kunai on his finger by the ring. Iruka slammed his head on his desk in response to the blatant disrespect. The Hokage just started writing in a notebook.

"Alright, Anko, Tora's run away again, Yama Tanuki needs her fence painted…" The Hokage looked through the D-Ranks.

"Uh, Ero-Godaime, I'd like a B-Rank." Anko smiled

"Anko! All genin have to start with D-Ranks! You know that as well as I do!" Iruka grumbled

"I also know that when a genin is apprenticed it's up to the teacher to decide on what missions to take. I want a B-Rank." Anko retorted. The Hokage sighed and held up a hand.

"She's right Iruka. A B-Rank then. We have a mission to destroy a dam in the Land of Rice Paddies. A mission to guard a prominent businessman while he's in the Land of the Sea, or we have an assassination in the Land of Waves. Take your pick."

"Who's the hit in the assassination."

"Gato of Gato Transport. The mission is being paid for by the Land of Waves as a whole. It's a high B-Rank, with the possibility of it being upgraded to A-Rank. We have reports of multiple shinobi present in his bodyguard corps."

"We'll take it." Anko said confidently. The Hokage sighed as if he had expected this and handed over the mission file. She started reading through the different reports of his routines and criminal acts within the Land of Waves.

"Tazuna-san come in!" Iruka shouted. A bearded old man smelling of alcohol and wearing a straw hat walked in.

"These two are going to be taking care of your problem." Iruka pointed to Anko and Naruto, who was still twirling the kunai on his finger.

"Those two are going to kill Gato? A kid and a woman dressed like a slut?" A kunai hit his hat and impaled it on the door. The two shinobi were on either side of him holding a weapon to his neck.

"Are you sure we're not good enough?" Anko whispered in the bridge builder's ear. The old man gulped and looked down at Naruto's blade. It was a trench knife with the Konoha symbol carved into the blade. Black cord was wrapped around the grip to make it easier to hold onto and the edge shined.

"You'll do…" The bridge builder gasped ", are you the ones escorting me back?" The two shinobi stepped away and shook their heads.

"We're just going to eliminate Gato." Naruto said confidently

"Tazuna-san, another team will be coming to protect you, I just thought you'd want to meet the people dealing with Gato." Iruka explained. Tazuna nodded, thanked Iruka and high tailed it out, grabbing his hat on the way out.

"Hokage-sama we'll leave for Wave in an hour. See ya Ero-Sannin." Anko waved goodbye and exited the room with Naruto in tow. The Hokage just stared at the door and couldn't help but smile at their antics.

_Konoha West Gate 11:00 A.M._

Kakashi arrived to see Team Seven and the bridge builder waiting impatiently for him. He waited for Sakura's inevitable outburst.

"Sorry I'm late a black cat cross my path, so I had to take the long way around…"Kakashi eye smiled

"Liar!" Sakura screeched. Kakashi ignored her and instead watched Anko and Naruto stroll up. Naruto had a ninjato across his back, while Anko just had her normal gear.

"Heyo!" Naruto waved.

"Naruto?! Where are you two going? You haven't even done any D-Ranks yet!" Sakura yelled.

"Sorry, Forehead, B-Rank mission, very hush hush. Gotta go now!" Naruto turned and walked away from the pink haired banshee.

"Hi guys." He greeted Tenten and Sasuke.

"Hey Naruto. Where have you been?" Sasuke asked

"While you guys have been doing D-Ranks, me and Anko-sensei were training."

"So where _are_ you going." Tenten was curious

"Sorry, but I was telling the truth to Sakura, I can't say, oops Anko-sensei is going, bye guys!" He waved and took off after his mom. He caught up with her and started walking alongside her until the two both disappeared with a flicker.

_The next day. Land of Waves. Near Gato's hideout. 1:00 P.M._

A map of Gato's compound was drawn on the ground. An outer wall around the whole thing, with a second wall 2 meters (A/N around 6 or 7 feet) beyond that not to mention dog patrols in between. Inside there was a single building patrolled by approximately a dozen samurai, and an unknown number of missing-nin. Anko and Naruto had been resting for around an hour to regain their strength before infiltrating. Now they were crouched down around the crude map. They had ditched their normal attire in exchange for black shirts, pants, and black chunin vests. Their black ninja sandals both had the metal plates on the toes and heels. A bandanna was over Naruto's blonde hair. Neither of them had on their headbands.

"Alright here's the plan. We'll infiltrate from where we are now and improvise once we're inside." Anko said seriously.

"Good plan…"Naruto deadpanned

"Can't help it squirt, we don't have much intel besides what the villagers told us." Anko winced.

"Well let's get going then I guess." Naruto sighed and stood up. Anko nodded and kicked the crude map out of existence. The two assassins then started jumping through the trees and arrived at the outer wall. The idiots had trees on both sides of the walls so it was easy to jump to the next tree in line and before long they were staring at a building. It was like an upside down spinning top ,and They could see five figures inside. Conversation drifted to them.

"Those two you sent haven't come back. I thought you said they were assassination specialists!" a short man said in a condescending tone

"They were. Apparently something happened. Don't worry, next time I'll kill the bridge builder myself." The second figure hefted a large sword and walked out of the building, with a second smaller figure following him. The pair of shinobi walked right under Naruto and Anko.

"Zabuza Momochi…"Anko breathed. The masked man kept walking, but Naruto could have sworn he saw a smirk under his mask.

"Do we take them out? It sounded like they were going after Team Seven." Naruto whispered urgently. Anko hesitated. Letting four Konoha-nin, three of whom were genin, walk into an ambush, wasn't exactly good conduct, but then, neither was blowing your cover in an assassination mission, so Anko compromised.

"I'll follow them and assist Kakashi and Team Seven. Can you handle this alone?" Anko knew he could, but wanted to make sure he was ready to make his first kill.

Naruto nodded "Yeah. I'll eliminate the target and catch up with you."

Anko clapped her son on the shoulder and jumped away after Zabuza and his companion. Naruto turned back to the top shaped building and moved forward slowly.

_Glass walls? What an idiot…_ Naruto thought as one of the two bodyguards opened a window. Naruto got within ten feet of the window and threw several senbon, three piercing the neck of each body guard. Gato heard the wet_ thump_ as his two samurai bodyguards hit the floor. He turned to see a teenager jump in through a window, with a knife out. Naruto didn't freeze when he saw the dead bodies. They weren't people. Konoha-nin were people. Your friends were people. Innocents were people. The two bodies on the floor were targets, nothing more.

The sniveling bastard on the floor in front of him was a target. The squat man, had had hundreds murdered for the sake of his business. For _money_. Naruto was little better, he was after all getting paid for this, but at least he had some morals. Konoha had taken the majority of the mission's payment from Wave as an IOU. Naruto shook off the thoughts of morals, and instead walked toward his target with his trench knife out. A quick thrust and Gato was dead, with his brain disconnected from the rest of his body. Naruto took the target's head as proof of the kill and left, jumping through the trees after his mother.

_Land of Waves. Team Seven Ambush Site. 1:30 PM._

"Everyone down!" Kakashi shouted. The entire group dropped as a massive sword flew over their heads. It hit a tree, and a shirtless man stood on the grip.

"Kakashi Hatake. No wonder the Demon Brothers never returned." The missing-nin growled.

"Zabuza Momochi." Kakashi lifted his headband revealing a sharingan eye. He turned to his genin squad.

"This guy is out of your league. Protect the bridge builder!" He noticed Sasuke trembling at the amount of killer intent that Zabuza was giving off. The Uchiha turned his blade toward himself.

"Sasuke!" The Uchiha looked to his sensei.

"Calm down! I'll protect you all with my life. I won't allow my comrades to die. That is absolute." He turned and gave them an eye smile. That put some steel into the genin. Enough that when Zabuza appeared inside the formation they all were able to turn and destroy the water clone. The fight went on until Kakashi dodged Zabuza, but ended up in the water. This enabled the missing-nin to put him in a water prison.

"Run! This guy is way out of your league!" Kakashi shouted from inside the bubble. The three genin hesitated, but began to turn until they heard a shout.

"Striking Shadow Snake!" And four vipers flew from the bushes. Unable to dodge in time due to his holding the water prison jutsu, a viper wrapped around Zabuza's arm and bit in deep. The pain of venom entering his body forced him to release the prison and he grabbed his injured arm. Kakashi fell into the water, as everyone looked to see a shinobi dressed all in black standing on a tree branch. By this time Kakashi had a kunai to Zabuza's throat, who dodged only to get hit with an Earth Style jutsu which threw him backwards into a large oak tree. The two Konoha jounin advanced on the now helpless man.

_Haku, where are you? Get me out of this! _The Demon of the Mist turned his eyes to where Haku should have been hiding just in time to see a body fall from the bushes. Another Konoha-nin walked out behind him and stood over the boy.

"Anko-sensei! Gato's dead. I doubt Zabuza will continue to fight now." The boy in a bandanna shouted. The two Konoha jounin looked to Zabuza questioningly. He just shook his head.

"If my employer is dead, we have no quarrel." Zabuza sighed. The two other jounin nodded, but didn't put away their weapons. Naruto dragged Haku over to Zabuza and tied both of them to a tree with ninja wire.

"You should be able to get out in a couple hours." Naruto stepped back and stood next to the jounin

"What about the snake bite?" Zabuza looked to Anko.

"You didn't get a huge dose. You'll feel like hell, but you'll survive." Anko turned and her student turned to walk away. She looked at Kakashi.

"We were never here." She raised her eyebrows. Kakashi nodded and she and her son disappeared. Zabuza raised his nonexistent eyebrows. _Anko Mitarashi eh? She's in my bingo book. Wonder who the kid was? To take down Haku, he might have to be put in there to. _Then the vipers venom reached his brain and he fell into unconsciousness.

_Konohagakure. 8 A.M Next morning._

The Mitarashis stumbled into Konoha. They had been going all night to get back, and were exhausted. By this time they were back in their usual outfits.

"Ugh, let's go report to the old man so we can go sleep." Anko mumbled. Naruto muttered something incoherent, but he followed Anko when she walked towards the Hokage's tower

_Hokage's Tower 8:10 A.M._

Anko and Naruto stumbled in and each practically collapsed into a chair. Jiraya smirked at them.

"Hello Anko." He said

"Yo Ero-Hokage…five more minutes…" Anko snored.

"How'd the mission go?"

"Gato, dead. Squirt, did it. Me, fight Zabuza." Anko muttered

"You fought Zabuza Momochi?" The Hokage was surprised.

"Yes. He gave up when, Gato died. Kakashi, stayed to finish bridge."

"Good. I've decided to give Naruto a promotion to chunin." The Mitarashis' eyes snapped open.

"Say what? He's only been on one mission!" Anko protested.

"This way he can accompany you on a job I have lined up. You're going to proctor to chunin exams."

"So it's temporary?" Naruto was a bit disappointed.

"We'll figure that out once the exams are over. In the mean time…"He raised his hand and two chunin appeared in the doorway.

"Take Naruto and Anko to the hospital and tell them to treat them for exhaustion."

The chunin nodded and picked up the protesting assassins. The protests ceased as both of the Mitarashis slipped into unconsciousness. The Hokage waited until they were gone to start laughing.

_Konoha Shinobi Hospital 11:30 A.M._

Naruto woke up to see a chunin flak vest lying on the edge of the bed with a note attached.

_This is yours. Doubt you'll wear it.-Godaime Hokage_

The new chunin laughed at the pervert's note, and examined the chunin vest. Standard thing, nothing to set him apart. Naruto shrugged, he'd probably never wear it.

"You're not going to wear that stupid thing right?" His mother's voice asked from the doorway.

"Of course not," he laughed "Trench coats and flak jackets don't mix!" His mother raised an eyebrow and smiled.

"That loyal to our fashion sense eh?"

"Look when I have lots of little Naruto's running around, every one of them is going to be wearing a trench coat."

"What? Gravity defying trench coats are gonna be the Mitarashi Clan's trademark?" Anko grinned

"Of course. The Inuzuka have fang marks. The Hyuuga have their googley eyes, and we'll have gravity defying trench coats."

Anko laughed and signaled for her son to get up.

"Come on we're heading to Dangoya to celebrate a successful mission."

"Alrighty. Let's go then." He jumped out of bed and followed his mother out of the window across the village. The nurses just checked him out on their own, being used to his not waiting.

_Dangoya, Konoha. 12:00 P.M _

"Hey! It's the newest chunin!" Genma shouted. The two Mitarashis were strolling into the back corner to the jounin booth. Genma, Asuma, and Yugao were sitting there.

"No I'm not buying your sake Genma." Naruto grinned as he scooted into the booth.

"I'm hurt that you think that I made that comment for sake!" Genma feigned sadness

"Yeah, Naruto you ought to be ashamed…"Yugao scolded.

"Not buying for you either Yugao." Naruto smiled at the ANBU. Everyone laughed at the young shinobi. The blonde raised his hand and signaled for a waiter.

"Give me the usual. Biggest bottle of sake you have." Naruto ordered. There was a cheer from the jounin. Naruto grinned at his friends. Anko slapped him in the back.

"Squirt, I knew I taught you well!"

Naruto just gave her a blank look as the jounin drank his money away. But he smiled and grabbed a bowl of sake himself. Before long there were five knee-knocking drunk shinobi arguing about what was better, kunai or shuriken. The main argument for kunai? It was more pointy. Shuriken? They spun and they look cool. Needless to say when Kurenai strolled over, she was wondering why all five were passed out, and around a dozen kunai and shuriken were embedded in the table.

**Reviews are appreciated. Thanks for all the feedback on this and Naruto Anko and the ANBU. If you like Fullmetal Alchemist I'm in the process of a FMA fanfic. Don't expect it to be updated as often as this is. I'll be updating now that the hammers and drills cured my writers block. Now if you'll excuse me brain matter is coming out of my ears again so I have to call 911.**


	11. The Chunin Exams

**Before we get to the story, I'd like to take a moment to thank Von Kreuz. He and I have been talking and giving each other ideas, and I have to say that some of the better ideas in my stories are from him. If you haven't had a chance to read his stuff, check him out, you won't be disappointed. **

**Thanks for the feedback everybody. Now begin the CHUNIN EXAMS ARC. I'll be spending a few chapters here, so the story will slow down quite a bit. Now then enough of my ramblings and now what you came for.**

**As always**

**Enjoy : D**

_Forest of Death.1:00 PM_

Naruto and Anko both had coffee in their hands, trying to stem their hangovers. A large map of the Forest of Death was spread out in front of them. They were planning their "surprises" for the genin squads that would be taking the chunin exams. Naruto was particularly vicious with his traps. They wouldn't kill but they would for sure knock a shinobi out of the exams. The price of failure was humiliation and possible death at the hands of animals and other examinees. The one he was going to set up right near the tower was similar to a bear trap except that it closed around the victims foot and suspended them in the air before releasing and dropping them on their heads. So a broken ankle and a concussion. If the idiot who got caught in it continued then he probably deserved whatever fate came to him or her. It was a couple hours before they had to go pick up their chew toys, so they strolled through the forest setting up their traps. By the time they were done, it was time to go pick up the genin.

_Konoha Shinobi Academy, Room 302 3:00 PM  
_"I can't do it…"

"Yeah, dude, I'm finished." a couple more genin raised their hands to quit. Ibiki smirked at them on the inside.

"Is that it, no one else, is leaving?" Ibiki raised his eyebrows. He was pleased to see all nine rookies were still in the room, and then he opened his mouth.

"Alright then there's only one more thing to say…"

Everyone looked at him expectantly.

"Congratulations, you've passed the first portion of the chunin exams." Ibiki grinned. Everyone looked at him bewildered. He began to explain the test, when he noticed black blobs coming from windows on both sides of the room. Everyone else noticed to and stood up to see what it was. Every single Konoha rookie, knew who it was. The windows shatter and two people rolled in. One in tan the other in black. They threw kunai and nailed a burgundy banner to the center of the wall, covering Ibiki. The two people in trench coats stood up in front of the sign. Everyone stared at the sign. On it was written

**_Introducing Anko and Naruto Mitarashi_**

**_Your Second Exam Proctors_**

Naruto's voice rang out "Alright, maggots listen up; we're your second exam proctors in case you're too stupid to read. Follow us to your testing area."

Ibiki came around the banner.

"You guys are early." He growled, trying to hold in his laughter.

"No, Ibiki, you're just late." Naruto grinned.

"Yeah, Ibiki, what's with all the extras?" Anko gave him a bored look. Ibiki shrugged.

"Good crop this year."

"Or you're slipping. Whatever, by the time me and Naruto are done, half will be gone." Anko grinned sadistically. Naruto matched it before saying.

"Nah, more along the lines of three quarters, these guys can't handle _our_ forest." Naruto began twirling a kunai on his finger.

"Anyway, brats, let's go. Me and my buddy are gonna head to Training Ground Forty-Four, be there before us or you get dropped from the exams." And Anko and Naruto disappeared with a flicker. The genin stampeded out of the room, and Ibiki smiled when the chunin and tokujo reappeared.

"Nice entrance." Ibiki complimented.

"Thanks! Anyone we should keep an eye on?" Anko asked

"The Oto-nin, they're twitchy as all hell. The others are a team of Kusa-nin they seemed a bit off, not sure, what it was, but I'd watch them." Ibiki informed the second exam proctors.

"How are the rookies doing?" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"Fine, Naruto. You're friends are actually kicking ass." Ibiki told the young chunin

"Alright, thanks for telling me. Hey mom let's get going before they _all_ get there." Naruto grinned

"Yeah, we gotta go, Ibiki, see ya round."

"Yep, bye guys." Ibiki went to pick up papers while Anko and Naruto disappeared out of the windows they had broken.

_Forest of Death 3:10 PM_

Naruto and Anko flickered into existence in front of the genin. One had a bowl of ramen, while the other had a stick of dango in her hand. They were munching happily, while the genin waited. Naruto opened one eye and tried to look surprised.

"Are you waiting on us?" He chewed and swallowed.

"Hey, Anko-sensei, they're waiting on us."

"So?"

"Good point." Naruto went back to his ramen, much to the chagrin of the genin, even going as far as to sit on the roof of a hut next to the fence. Both proctors finished their food and stood side by side in front of the genin. Naruto shoved his hands in his pockets and waited for Anko to explain.

"Welcome, to the Forest of Death." She hissed out. Naruto smiled at the now thoroughly creeped out genin.

"This is where you'll be taking your second exam. The point is to get a set of these scrolls, and get to the tower in the center of the forest within five days. You have permission to kill if necessary." Anko held up two scrolls marked with the kanji for Heaven and Earth. Then Naruto stepped forward with a stack of papers.

"I need each of you to sign one of these waivers, in case of your death."

"Death?" a genin gulped.

"Duh, it's in the name of the forest you moron, what did you think it was called the Forest of Death, because of the fluffy bunnies in there?" Naruto looked at the Ame genin like he was an idiot.

"Stop playing it up, like we're all going to die, ya twerp, who cares what the Forest is called." Kiba shouted out, and then a kunai cut open his cheek. His eyes went wide as Anko leaned down next to his face and licked the blood off of the wound.

"You know, the loudmouths usually die first." The Snake Mistress whispered in his ear. Then she felt something coming. Anko put a kunai up to the face of the Kusa-nin leaning over her shoulder with a kunai. There was a gust of wind, and Naruto had his custom trench knife to the throat of the Kusa-nin. He was crouched low with one leg extended out and his arm reaching up to the Kusa genin's throat.

"Drop it…"his voice sounded menacing.

"I was merely returning Mitarashi-sans kunai." The woman dropped the kunai into Naruto's extended hand, and backed away from the chunin's blade. Naruto huffed

"I don't take chances with my mom…" Then turned to Sakura standing nearby.

"Forehead, hand out these waivers, and make it snappy!" A now thoroughly pissed off Naruto told the pink haired girl. The Haruno looked like she was going to protest, but Naruto's eyes flashed, and she found herself sort off intimidated. Tenten and Sasuke were off to the side, stunned. They hadn't even seen Naruto move. In a way Sasuke was jealous, but he snapped out of it when Sakura waved a paper in front of his face.

"Sasuke-kun, wake up, sign this so I can give it to that idiot."

Sasuke sighed and signed the paper, then gave it to Tenten who signed it as well. Sakura snatched the paper and handed to it Naruto.

"Ok, kiddies. Go behind that curtain and get your scroll." Anko yelled out pointing to the hut they had been sitting on. Naruto leaned against the fence with his arms crossed. Anko walked up.

"Calm down, squirt. I know that pissed you off, but before long they'll be gone." Naruto's mother whispered while leaning next to him.

"Mom, that bitch had a knife to your neck. There was blood lust there, not just giving your kunai back. I'm keeping an eye on those Kusa-nin once the exam starts, I don't like them." Naruto spat.

"Alright. Remember if you interfere in any fights both teams are disqualified, so whatever you do, don't do that."

Naruto chuckled.

"It'll be fine. After all, it's not like Orochimaru is gonna show up right?"

Anko laughed and agreed that the snake bastard wasn't showing. Around 10 yards away a Kusa-nin was laughing to herself.

_Kukukukuku Oh, if only you knew, Anko-chan. That boy of yours is rather interesting as well. Who knew that Anko would adopt a child? This should be interesting._ Orochimaru thought.

"Alright, maggots get to your starting gates!" Naruto shouted with his hands cupped over his mouth. The genin walked to their respective gates, and Naruto looked at his watch,

"5…4…3…2…1" Naruto mumbled and then a loud buzzer sounded and every genin sprinted into the forest. Anko grabbed a box of dango from inside the hut, and sat down. Naruto popped open a box, and grabbed a stick before turning to jump into the forest.

"I'll see ya later, mom."

"See ya squirt."

Then Naruto used a chakra fueled jump and bounded into the Forest of Death.

_With Team Seven._

"…that is the time for a ninja to strike." Tenten and Sakura repeated back to Sasuke, who nodded in approval.

"Good. Now I think we should head to the tower early, we can catch a team with scrolls there." Sasuke stood up, but heard a cackling voice from the trees.

"Good plan, Sasuke-kun, but I suggest you stay here." The smug female voice said. All three genin went for kunai, but found themselves unable to move. Sasuke, Sakura, and Tenten all recognized the feeling they got from the Land of Waves. But this killer intent put Zabuza's to shame. A Kusa-nin walked out of the forest chuckling.

"Poor children, it appears that you're frozen with fear. Here let me fix that." Orochimaru threw three kunai, but the genin were no longer present. He raised an eyebrow.

"So, you're gone are you? Not bad, Sasuke-kun. Use pain to break yourself out of shock." Then he sannin summoned a large snake and went after Team Seven through the forest.

_With Naruto._

"God, that lady has some crazy killer intent." Naruto muttered. He was following the large snake, and had not yet been seen. The chunin stopped around fifty feet from the fight, and watched Sasuke proceed to give up Team Seven's scroll. Then something happened that surprised Naruto. The Kusa-nin burned the Heaven scroll, and explained that she was going to kill them either way. Then things went to hell from there. When Sakura was hit by the tail of a large snake, Sasuke finally pulled his head out of his ass, and fought back. Naruto nodded in satisfaction as the Kusa-nin was tied to a tree and dealt with by Sasuke. A dragon of fire impacted the woman, and her screams could be heard. Naruto didn't flinch, after all, she was a target.

Then he cursed out loud. The woman pulled her _face_ off, and chuckled, and from the sound of it, it was a man, not a woman. Naruto cursed out loud for a very simple reason. Anko had told him of Orochimaru, and about several of his jutsu. This matched up perfectly with the description of the Face Capture Jutsu. Naruto growled, and then pulsed his chakra rapidly, signaling for ANBU and jounin to collapse on his location. Then he sprinted forward to where Sasuke was held by Orochimaru. He revealed something that he hadn't shown anyone, besides Kakashi, and the Hokage. He thrust out his hand.

"Striking Shadow Snake!" and four cobras flew from the sleeve of his trench coat.

Orochimaru dodged, still holding onto Sasuke.

"Kukukukukukuku, it seems I've been found. How has Anko-chan been doing Naruto-kun?"

"My mom's none of your business Orochimaru." Naruto snarled as he landed on a branch. "I'd be more worried about the here and now." Naruto went through several hand signs and used a substitution jutsu. And found himself in wrapped in Orochimaru's tongue. He drew his ninjato from his back, and cut the wet rope. The snake-sannin cried out in pain and snarled at Naruto.

"Team Seven get the hell out of here! That's an order!" Naruto shouted as he took a kenjutsu stance.

"Naruto-kun, I…"Tenten began

"Tenten, I said now! Anyone who doesn't leave will be disqualified and prosecuted!" Naruto yelled out. Tenten nodded and picked up an unconscious Sakura, and followed Sasuke into the trees.

" tsk tsk tsk, Naruto-kun. You've let my prey get away."

Naruto responded with a jutsu.

"Lightning Style: Static Strike." He slammed his hand into a branch and the trees around him shattered. Orochimaru snarled and jumped into the air as he was cut up by wood fragments. Naruto meanwhile had back flipped and hid behind a tree he'd left intact for that purpose. Naruto felt something coming and jumped away before the tree exploded into fire. He bounced off the remains of a tree and flew towards Orochimaru with his ninjato ready. The blade was snapped by a kunai, as Orochimaru went into a battle with Naruto. The chunin wasn't arrogant. The snake was toying with him. If he were serious Naruto would already be dead. So he decided to prove that Orochimaru shouldn't play with is food. He hid behind the remains of a tree and strapped several paper bombs to himself

_Sorry, mom, but I guess you'll achieve and lose something in the same day_. Naruto smiled wistfully thinking of his psychotic mother. Then he created one hundred shadow clones and they all bounded towards Orochimaru, screaming in rage as they did so. The original wrapped up Orochimaru, and screamed

"Detonate!" and five explosions were heard.

Naruto seemed to be falling. He knew he was lying on a splintered branch, but he also knew that his left arm and shoulder were gone, and so was his right hand. His chest was burnt to a crisp, but he felt no pain. The dying chunin turned his head to the left and saw blood spraying onto a tree trunk. He turned his head to the right and saw a burnt corpse that was missing its torso. He smiled weakly. At least he didn't go down alone. Then his smile disappeared when he heard chuckling.

"A very noble effort, Naruto-kun. But very selfish, think of how Anko-chan will feel when she finds out that her beloved son is dead." Orochimaru leaned down to smile smugly at Naruto. Naruto whispered something inaudible.

"What was that Naruto-kun?" Orochimaru pretended to care as he put his ear next the chunin's mouth.

"Don't play with your food." Naruto growled and he grabbed Orochimaru's ear in his teeth and jerked with his head. Blood spattered his face, and he heard Orochimaru scream in pain.

"You little bastard!" the snake-sannin grabbed the right side of his head. Naruto grinned a final time, with a pale ear in his teeth, as his eyes closed. Then he felt a burning pain in his neck, his eyes shot open and he saw Orochimaru's head next to his neck, sinking his teeth in.

"Defiant to the very end, eh, Naruto-kun? Admirable I must say. With this gift you just may survive. Your chances are more along the lines of one in a thousand instead of one in ten, but oh well. That fox inside you, already seems to be taking care of your other injuries."

Naruto turned to his surprise and disgust his lost limbs were actually slowly _regenerating_. Then Naruto felt the most excruciating pain he'd ever felt and he began screaming. He heard the shout of a female voice, and Orochimaru speaking until he blacked out from blood loss.

_With Anko in the Forest of Death._

Anko was sprinting through the Forest of Death. Naruto had pulsed his chakra, so he was obviously in trouble. Then she heard several explosions. So she wasn't far. Then she sensed a chakra that sent shivers up here spine.

_Orochimaru. Naruto is fighting Orochimaru_. Anko began to panic a little bit and her pace picked up. She burst into a circle of sunlight caused by exploded trees, and she saw Orochimaru kneeling Naruto…sinking his teeth into his neck.

"God dammit!" Anko shouted

"Ah, Anko-chan, you should probably get a medic, Naruto-kun appears to be dying. Don't stop the exams if you know what is good for you. Goodbye now." And he sank into the splintered branches. Anko paled at Naruto's condition. He was missing an arm and a hand, and his chest was burnt all to hell, his clothes were shredded and all that was left of his clothing was pieces of his trench coat and his pants. Everything else, even his headband, was gone. He was passed out, and Anko saw blood all over the tree trunk next to her son. The jounin jumped over and felt for a pulse. It was there, but faint. She picked up her son, and used a chakra fueled jump to head for the tower. When the ANBU showed up they'd be left wondering because a portion of the forest was leveled, and they had no idea why.

_The Tower of Death_

"MEDIC!" Anko screamed at the top of her lungs as she sprinted inside the tower. A group of chunin and jounin burst in to the room and paled at the sight of Naruto's condition. Several more shouts for medics began circulating until around an eternity, one minute thirty seconds, later, six medic-nin showed up with a stretcher. Naruto was sat on the white cloth which was immediately stained red. A medic sprinted alongside the group of medics, and felt for his pulse.

"I lost the pulse!" He shouted urgently. He slammed his hand on Naruto's chest and forced chakra into his heart. Naruto had been dead for forty-five seconds before his heart restarted.

"We need blood transfusions ready!" shouted one of the medics, and a chunin ran ahead to inform the medics at the clinic. Anko meanwhile was behind the group, keeping up, but not wanting to get in the way. She ignored her instincts and instead stopped outside the clinic's operating room. A certain silver-haired jounin walked up to her and steadied the woman who was about to fall.

"Are you alright, Anko?" Kakashi asked gently

"What the hell do you think Kakashi? My son is missing an arm and he was dead for a minute!" Anko screamed at the man.

"Anko, he'll be fine. Trust me, if anyone will pull through it's him." Kakashi forced the woman to sit down on a bed, and the woman actually started crying. Kakashi left her to go and inform the Hokage of Naruto's condition. Jiraya was in the tower, and doing some paperwork, when Kakashi came in. The Sondaime was in the room as well, wanting to see the results of the exams.

"Hokage-sama, I'm sorry to interrupt, but Naruto just came in. He was critically wounded. If I'm right he was missing an arm, and was dead for almost a minute until they got his heart restarted."

Jiraya was already on his feet and heading for the door, as was Hiruzen. Kakashi was already out of the door, and leading them to the clinic. None of the men were running. There was nothing they could do if Naruto was already in the operating room. They walked in and, while Jiraya and Kakashi went to find a doctor, the Sondaime sat next to a sobbing Anko, and for the first time in ages, the woman grabbed and held onto someone besides Naruto and held tight.

_In Naruto's Mindscape_

**"What were you trying to do, you idiot? Kill us both?" the Kyuubi snarled.**

"If it meant killing Orochimaru, I was prepared to do it."

**"You're a moron, you know that? If I wasn't sealed in you you'd already be dead." **

"I know that. Thanks by the way. Look Kyuubi, I know we've come to an agreement, but wouldn't you blow yourself up to kill Madara?" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

The kyuubi sighed, if hurricane force winds could be called a sigh.

**"Yes, kit, I would. Now look. I'm regenerating your arm and hand, but promise me, you'll never do anything that dumb ever again, and I'll warn you again. Do ****_not_**** access the power of the seal he put on you. I barely managed to nullify it, but if you try to use it, it will still answer your call. But do ****_not_**** use it. It's power corrupts and is addicting. Use it and you'll go looking for Orochimaru.**

"I can't make any promises Kyuubi. I bit the bastard's ear off; do you honestly think I could resist killing him even if it meant killing myself? The bastard hurt my mom in ways me and you can't imagine, so I _will_ kill him. And no I won't be using the mark he put on me. My mom taught me about his curse marks, so no, I know what it does. Looks like I gotta go. See ya Kyuubi." And Naruto faded

**"Goodbye, kit."** Kyuubi sighed. The kid had guts that was for sure, but he was really stupid sometimes. If Naruto had used the Kyuubi's chakra then he might have had a chance at delaying the snake until other shinobi showed up. But he wouldn't. The kid was to idealistic. Then Kyuubi smiled, if a display of razor sharp teeth the size of trucks could be called that, and laid down to sleep. Naruto would be fine.

_Tower of Death Clinic. One day after Naruto's battle with Orochimaru._

Anko sat in the chair and stared at her son. He was stable and his arms had miraculously come back. The medics were baffled, but anyone above jounin level knew exactly why his arms had regenerated. Because of hit tenant. And then there was the Curse Mark. Anko sighed and got up walking over to her son. She ran her hands down his neck and felt the velvety feel of the three heaven tomoe. Then they heated up. Anko's eyes narrowed and she pushed a little harder on the seal. Then she felt a pain in her head and collapsed.

_Naruto's Mindscape._

Anko looked around at the sewer she had woken up in. She got up and walked forward looking for a way out, until she came to a massive cage. On it was a seal identical to the one on Naruto's stomach. Anko shivered when she realized where she was.

"I'm in Naruto's head…" Anko said out loud

**"Correct, vixen, you are in your son's head," **a deep and commanding voice came from the cage **", and since you figured that out, I guess you know who I am." **

"I'm gonna take a wild guess and say you're the Kyuubi." Anko raised an eyebrow, not letting the utter terror she felt enter her voice.

**"Correct. Now I'm going to tell you, that I'm not going to kill you, because the kit loves you more than life itself, and you've taken care of him as if her were your own."**

"Wait, are you saying you care about my kid?" Anko was incredulous

**"Of course I do, he's a nice kid. What, just because I'm a demon, I have to be evil?" **The Kyuubi growled.

"Uh, yeah, I mean I don't know a nice demon." Anko fired back

**"How many demons do you know?" **

"Good point. So why am I here?"

**"Because you touched the curse mark that the snake put on the kit. It's a direct conduit to his head, and since your own curse mark resonated with his you got sent in here." **The Kyuubi explained.

"Alright, well why are you talking to me?"

**"Because I have a proposition. It will allow me to fully nullify the kit's curse mark as well as your own. But you'll have to trust me. I'm going to be altering your DNA, and messing with a few things. Don't worry I won't turn you into some kind of freak, but your appearance will change."**

"Uh, I don't think I want you messing with my chromosomes…"Anko said a little drily

**"Too late you touched the curse mark and you're here, so I'm messing with your DNA right now. Want something changed while I'm doing this?"**

"You're kidding right? You're altering my DNA as we speak."

**"Yeah."**

"Ugh. Why do you need to do this anyway?"

**"Because the Cursed Seal of Heaven ties in directly with your DNA, I need to shift a few things around to be able to nullify it. As a side effect, you and Naruto will both receive some of the other's traits. I'll also be able to use this as a conduit to get to the outside world."**

Anko panicked.

"You mean the seal is broken!?" Her voice sounded high pitched

**"No vixen it isn't, but I can use this to come out in a weaker form. I'll be about the size of a dog, and I won't have nine-tails.** **Anyway, I'll ask again, is there anything you want changed while I'm in your genes?"**

"No. Don't touch anything you don't need to." Anko sighed. The Kyuubi grunted in agreement.

**"Alright. That's it, I'm finished. You'll probably be knocked out for at least two days. When you wake up, you'll find some things different as well as the fact that your curse mark is different. Goodbye now Anko Mitarashi. It was good to meet the woman my host thinks so highly of." **

"Um…likewise, Kyuubi. It was cool to meet a greater demon…I think…" Anko was struck dumb as everything that happened collapsed on her mind. Then she faded, and the Kyuubi started laughing. He found that he like his kit's mother.

_Tower of Death Clinic, same time._

A nurse ran over when Anko collapsed, and called for a doctor.

A medic-nin ran over and checked her vitals.

"She's fine physically. It was most likely exhaustion. Let's get her to a bed." The medic-nin picked up Anko and the nurse grabbed her feet. They lifted her into the bed next to Naruto's, and they left Anko to sleep soundly.

**Obviously Naruto and the Kyuubi are in more contact than known. **

**NO FLAME PLEASE I DOUSED MYSELF IN GASOLINE AND I DONT WANT TO DIE!**

**Reviews are appreciated though. Have a good one everybody, I must rest after these updates, I worked all night, so enjoy them :D.**


	12. The Preliminaries

**I dont have anything funny to say. So just picture a German shepard wearing a bowler hat.**

**I don't own Naruto. **

**As Always**

**Enjoy :D**

_Tower of Death Clinic: Two Days Later._

Anko awoke and felt like crap. She remembered her talk with the fox, and she'd had some weird dreams afterward, including one where she saw herself and Naruto riding a flying Kyuubi in front of a moon.

"Where have I seen that before?" Anko thought out loud.

"Oh, you're awake Mitarashi-san." A medic-nin smiled at her.

"Obviously," Anko said drily, "how long was I out?"

"Two days. You collapsed next to your son's bed."

"I remember. My face feels weird is that a side effect of some medication you gave me or something?" Anko rubbed her face and felt nothing there. The medic-nin chuckled and handed her a mirror. Anko, sat up, looked in it and her eyes widened.

"They appeared there not long after you collapsed."

Six very prominent marks similar to whiskers were on her face, three on each cheek. Anko was a bit weirded out but the fox had told her to expect this. She decided she actually kind of liked them. She smiled and was surprised to see her canines had lengthened somewhat. _Another side effect of the DNA stuff. I still don't like that the bastard messed around with my body without my consent. _Anko mused.

"Um, Mitarashi-san, you might want to take a look at your cursed seal as well." The medic-nin said carefully. Anko pulled back her mesh shirt and took a look at the seal. What she saw there shocked her ever so slightly. The seal had been altered drastically. Instead of three tomoe there was a single tomoe with nine tail-like extensions coming from it. Around it was a seal that seemed to glow when she touched it. And then Anko realized something. It didn't hurt. She hadn't had nightmares either. Whatever the fox had done, the curse mark was no longer influencing her mind. Anko was so shocked that she didn't know what to say.

"Um, Mitarashi-san, I understand that this is a bit strange for you, but perhaps you could explain your son's, err, changes." The medic-nin pointed and Anko turned and her eyes widened. Naruto was now a good foot and a half taller than he used to be and there was something _very_ noticeable about him. Naruto's hair was now a dark purple like Anko's, and the spikes were now gone, replaced with hair that just fell whichever way it felt like. Frankly, it creeped Anko out. She was used to seeing him with blonde spikes, not dark purple hair.

"One more thing Mitarashi-san. We're running low on blood for him, and we wanted to know if you'd donate, it's best from a family member?" the medic-nin asked

"He's O-, I'm A+, how would I help him? Besides he's adopted." Anko raised an eyebrow.

"Um, Mitarashi-san, his blood type is A+ and your DNA matches up nearly perfectly. I knew he was adopted, but according to the DNA you're his biological mother." The medic informed Anko. The tokujo did the only think any rational person would do. She passed out.

"Ok, so I'm guessing that she won't mind if we take some blood." The medic walked away shaking his head. This was the weirdest damn than he'd ever seen.

Naruto sat up in bed, but winced in pain a little bit. He looked down and his chest was covered in bandages. He looked to his left and saw Anko lying there. Then he saw that the fox had been true to his word. His left arm and right hand were back. Naruto flexed them and they seemed to work fine. Then he noticed something weird. His hair was purple. He saw a mirror lying next to Anko and he grabbed it, and looked in it. Ok, so not only was his hair purple, it was no longer spiked, and his eyes were deep brown. Naruto was struck dumb.

"Weird dream…" the chunin commented on his new appearance, his voice sounded a bit deeper as well.

"It's not a dream Naruto." He looked to his left where Anko was sitting up massaging her temples. Now he noticed that she had whiskers, and her canines had lengthened, but her hair and eye color hadn't changed.

For Anko's part she was surprised that Naruto now had deep brown eyes as well, but as she thought about it, she probably should have expected that. Other than that Anko noticed no changes to Naruto's person.

"What the hell happened to _us_?" Naruto was confused

"Kyuubi happened to us. That asshole messed around with our DNA." Anko growled

"Wait…what?" Naruto was even more confused, how did she know Kyuubi did this?

"How did you know that." The former blonde asked his mother.

"I had a talk with him."

"_What? How did you talk with Kyuubi?_" Naruto was incredulous now. Anko explained touching his curse mark, and getting transported into his head, where she had a talk with his tenant. Then she remembered something. She looked at his curse mark and it, indeed, was now identical to hers, down the last tail.

"And, um, there's something else…"Anko muttered

"Huh? What is it? Am I going to become a woman next?" Naruto said drily. He had liked his blonde hair, it set him apart.

"Um, according to DNA tests…I may or may not be…your biological mother." Anko looked at him and waited for the outburst.

"Huh?" was all Naruto had to say.  
"I think it's a side effect of Kyuubi messing with our DNA." Anko said as if this explained it.

"Huh?" Naruto repeated.

"I said I'm your biological mother according to DNA." Anko repeated back to her son. Then Naruto did something unexpected. He smiled…

"Cool…I mean we act just the same why not be related and look alike?" Naruto raised an eyebrow, and looked at Anko, who was thinking. Now that she thought about it, he was right.

"Yeah! I guess it is pretty cool!" Anko grinned. And then she realized something. Naruto was awake.

"Oh my god, Naruto, you're awake! Lay back down you idiot! Medic! Naruto's awake." Anko shouted before hugging her son tight.

"What the hell were you thinking attacking Orochimaru?" Anko scolded while the medic took Naruto's vitals.

"Gave the bastard a run for his money." Naruto grinned.

"Are you kidding me? You were missing an arm, and a hand."

"That was my own doing." Naruto smiled lessened a little bit.

"What?! You did that to yourself?" Anko was incredulous

"I strapped paper bombs to myself and grabbed the asshole, but he used a mud clone. The way I see it I was screwed either way."

Anko punched the back of his head

"You dumbass, what were you thinking?" Anko yelled

"The bastard hurt you Mom! I told you when I was four years old that I was going to protect you! And the best way to do that was to kill his ass! No matter the cost." Naruto said evenly

"Killing him isn't worth your life you little idiot!" Anko snapped

"It is to me. The man hurt you mom, and if I have my way he won't ever hurt you again." Naruto fired back

"Ahem…"The Sondaime and Godaime Hokage were standing in the corner.

"Kid, when you came in, it was touch and go." Jiraya said raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, well the snake bastard didn't do it, I did." Naruto informed

"Yes we heard. Uh, why was Orochimaru's ear between your teeth when you arrived?" The Sondaime asked carefully.

"Ain't it obvious? I bit it off, when he leaned close to toy with me." Naruto said as if this were natural. Everyone present shivered except for one. She grinned.

"_That's my boy!_" Anko clapped her son on the shoulder.

"Anko!" The Sondaime and Godaime both snapped

"What? How many kids do you know that have the balls to bite the ear off the Snake-Sannin?" Anko grinned at the two Hokage. Jiraya had to admit the kid was gutsy, and the Sondaime was a little amused that his most arrogant student was outdone by a thirteen year old, but neither of them thought it was ok for Anko to be promoting that kind of thing.

"Ok, yeah, it makes him gutsy, but what if Orochimaru had killed him, instead of marking him?" Jiraya raised an eyebrow. Anko deflated a bit, but Naruto just grinned wider.

"Wanna know something funny Ero-Hokage?" Naruto asked

"What?" Jiraya was curious.

"Orochimaru wouldn't have killed me no matter what I did. He wanted to use me to manipulate Anko. The first thing he said to me was 'How is Anko-chan doing' so I knew then and there that he wanted to use me. Another reason I blew the hell out of myself." Naruto mused. Jiraya still wasn't convinced. Naruto saw that and ended the conversation.

"Ero-Hokage, I'm alive, and our curse marks are nullified. We're both ok. Orochimaru is wounded, and probably in hiding. We're ok for now. The medics say I'm ok to leave as soon as this last blood transfusion is over and done with." Naruto assured the Toad Sage.

"Naruto, did you say that your curse mark is nullified?" The Sondaime narrowed his eyes.

"Both of ours are. The hair, eyes, and whiskers are a side effect." Naruto smiled.

"Who did it?" Jiraya had an idea of who had done it.

"Not outside your office." Naruto said seriously. This confirmed what the Sondaime and Godaime had both been thinking.

"Anyway! How are the exams going? Have the kiddies fallen into any of my traps?" Naruto was back in good spirits.

"Oh yeah! Me, Naruto, and a couple others had a pool going on who's traps would get the most people, mine or Naruto's." Anko was suddenly excited. The Sondaime puffed on his pipe.

"The last I heard, my person was ahead by four." The Sondaime smirked

"Who is it?" Anko had a sinking feeling.

"Naruto." The Sondaime laughed. Jiraya shivered.

"God, kid, the last one I saw was demonic. How could you do that to your fellow man?"

"Which one was it?" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"I believe I saw a log impact between a man's legs and send him flying into a tree where he fell onto a pole and racked himself." Jiraya shuddered and remembered every man in the room had stopped and stared in horror at the screens when that trap had been set off.

Naruto smiled

"That was a product of Anko's and my heads being put together on one trap."

"I don't think he'll be able to have kids, Naruto."

"Aw, screw it. He serves it if he fell into a trap like that." Naruto shrugged. The medic came and disconnected him from the blood bag he had been connected to as it emptied.

"Thanks." Naruto nodded to the medic, who smiled and walked away. The chunin slowly got to his feet with his mother steadying him. She handed him a pair of crutches and he steadied himself on them. Then he noticed something else. He was nearly eye level with his mom. She noticed this to, and shook her head. The two Hokage didn't ask questions figuring this was another side effect.

"So, am I still squirt?" Naruto grinned

"Of, course you are, squirt. You'll always be squirt." Anko grinned back

"Uh, Old Man, do we have any chunin outfits handy? I have to go shopping when I get out of here."

"I'll see what I can do." Jiraya snapped and two chunin appeared in the door. They looked in shock at Naruto, but then snapped back to attention.

"Run out, and grab a uniform and chunin vest for Naruto." Jiraya ordered.

"Yes Hokage-sama." The two chunin bowed and disappeared in smoke. The four people sat and chatted while they waited for something decent for Naruto to wear. The subject soon came to Jiraya's book series.

"Ero-Hokage, it's smut." Anko gave him a deadpan look.

"Everyone has their own form of art." Jiraya fired back

"No, I think she's right. It's porn." Naruto took his mother's side.

"Not all of them are bad, you two." The Sondaime stepped next to the Godaime.

"Uh, if I may, I find that the_ Icha Icha _series is entertaining." A male nurse shouted out.

"Who asked you?" Naruto and Anko yelled. While the two Hokage smiled approvingly.

"That's three vs two so far." Jiraya raised an eyebrow. Naruto formed a hand sign and a crowd of Narutos appeared.

"Now it's fifty-two against three. The odds are overwhelmingly in our favor, we win." Anko grinned at the look on the Hokages' faces. The two chunin reappeared with clothes for Naruto. He went behind a curtain to pull them on and emerged in a standard except for the fact that he had neglected a shirt.

"No shirt?" Jiraya pointed out.

"I don't want to mess with the bandages."

"Oh."

"Ugh, let's get this exam over with so I can go and get a new outfit, and out of this monkey suit." The former blonde complained.

Anko spoke up.

"I might be able to loan you one of mine. Our apartment _is _upstairs after all."

"But I like black…"Naruto frowned.

"It's better than nothing. I only have tan take it our leave it." Anko fired back.

"Deal." Naruto stated after thinking a minute.

"Be right back." Anko grinned and disappeared with a flicker, only to reappear around thirty seconds later with tan trench coat in hand. Naruto ditched the flak vest, and pulled on the coat, it fit him well, except for the fact that his shoulders were farther across than his mother. Suddenly Jiraya burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?!" Naruto demanded.

"You look like Anko without a pony tail!" The pervert held his sides. Naruto looked in a mirror and sure enough he looked like a male version of his mother.

"Well, she _is _my biological mother now, what'd you expect…"Naruto deadpanned. Everyone in the room decided that this was true. The two Mitarashis walked out of the room, and they looked virtually identical even in the way they walked. Or sort of stalked around ,rather.

_With Naruto and Anko_

"By the way mom, how much time is left in the exam?" Naruto looked to his mother

"I don't know." Anko was surprised that she hadn't asked that question herself. The two purple haired people stopped, and stared at each other. That's when it struck them both. They were _actually_ mother and son. Not because so paper said so, but because they actually _were_ related. Naruto spoke once more

"We should probably go find someone who can fill us in."

Anko found her voice.

"Yeah, let's go."

As luck would have it someone else found them first. A chunin ran up.

"Anko-san, Naruto-san, the last of the teams just came in. That makes it 21 genin through." The chunin told them.

Anko whistled. The five days weren't even up, and every team was in. Not unheard of, but still rather rare. And they would have to hold a preliminary as well. They hadn't had to do that in three years.

"Alright. Thanks for telling us. We'll be out there in a minute." Anko dismissed the chunin. She grinned at Naruto.

"Let's go see the lucky contestants, squirt." And the two began walking.

_Tower of Death. Training Room. _

Tenten tapped Sasuke on the shoulder.

"Sasuke, do you think we'll see Naruto?" Tenten sounded a bit afraid that he wasn't going to show. Sasuke turned and reassured his friend.

"Tenten, if anyone will be alright, it's Naruto. Did you notice that Orochimaru immediately turned his attention to Naruto, when he showed up? It's because he thought of Naruto as a threat." Tenten, reassured, smiled and turned back to where the Sondaime and Godaime Hokage and a smattering of jounin were standing in front of the twenty-something genin.

"We're waiting for your second exam proctors, so if you'll be patient, we'll begin as soon as they're here," The Sondaime announced.

"We're here Sondaime-sama, just give me, a second please, crutches tend to slow a guy down." Naruto's voice rang out in the room. Everyone turned to where Naruto and Anko were entering the room from the back.

Sasuke, saw Anko and her friend, but he didn't see Naruto. Then he noticed something. Her friend looked virtually identical to Naruto except for the fact that he had purple hair, deep brown eyes, and was as tall as Anko.

_No way, that isn't possible._ Sasuke looked to Tenten who looked as shocked as he did.

The two proctors moved to the front of the group as well, and Naruto spotted all nine rookies staring at him curiously. He smiled thinly, but winced when his chest started to throb. He slumped a bit into his crutches and Anko grabbed his arm to steady him.

"You ok, Naruto?" Anko sounded worried.

"I'm fine." Naruto rasped.

"Bullshit you're fine." Anko sneered. She turned to the Sondaime. He nodded.

"Can we get a chair for Naruto-san please?" the Sondaime said to a chunin off to the side.

"Oh, hell no!" Naruto protested "I'm not gonna sit, like some cripple. I'm a shinobi, dammit, I've dealt with worse."

"Naruto, you were missing an arm, a hand, and most of your internal organs had shutdown." Anko deadpanned.

"Uh, Anko-sensei…" Naruto pointed to the shocked faces of the genin.

"Shit…"Anko muttered.

Tenten was shocked into silence. Naruto had been wounded that badly in his fight? The weapons user started to regret abandoning him to fight Orochimaru alone.

Sasuke was just as stunned as his teammate. But for a different reason. Not only had Naruto gotten wounded that badly, but he'd _survived!_

The rest of the genin were having similar thoughts and Naruto saw the looks on the faces of Tenten and Sasuke. He stood up a little straighter in his crutches, and opened his mouth.

"Will, Konoha Team Seven follow me please?" He went down the two steps and made his way to the door. The three genin had already left and were outside the door waiting for him. Before they even opened their mouths he silenced them.

"Guys, my appearance is a long story. One that is also a double S-Rank secret. But I'm going to tell you that my wounds were completely and utterly my fault. They were literally my fault; I strapped paper bombs to myself and detonated them to kill the bastard. No I didn't get him. Now get back in the formation. We'll talk later."

The wounded shinobi turned back and went back to his spot. There was a chair sitting there.

"Nope." He said simply and turned away from the chair. Anko sighed in frustration then she and Naruto went to the center of the stage.

"Alright, brats, now that my stubborn ass son is done having a conniption fit over a chair, I'm here to tell you that you've all passed the second exam. Congratulations."

Now a previously quiet Hayate spoke.

"But don't get excited yet. None of you have made it to the third exam yet." Hayate coughed out was normal once again. There were some protests and questions, and Naruto got a tick above his eye.

"Shut up!" He yelled "I'm not in the mood for whiners. I'm in pain, so I'd like to get this over with!"

The genin quieted down.

"Now look. Dignitaries will come from around the world to see the chunin exams. So we can't waste their time. As such we'll be holding a preliminary match to determine who is good enough to go to the third exam. You'll be fighting in a series of one on one matches. They'll be chosen at random by the screen behind me. If I see a fight is hopeless I'll step in, but don't depend on me to do so. If you feel you can't win, forfeit. Any questions?"

There were several.

"Good to see everyone understands. Let's get to the first match." Hayate turned to look at the screen. It went through the names of the genin in front of him. Then it stopped on two.

"First up is Temari vs Sakura Haruno, everyone except those two head up to the balconies on either side of the floor." After the genin and their senseis and gathered in their spots Hayate stepped between the two genin.

"Begin!" he jumped backwards. Temari just stood there smirking. Sakura quickly got frustrated and yelled out

"Watch this Sasuke-kun!" and she charged the Suna kunoichi.

"Wind Scythe Jutsu!"

A large gust of wind could be felt and Sakura was blown backwards. The Haruno had multiple cuts on her arms and legs. Temari had partially opened a large fan on her back, and a purple circle could be seen there.

"That's just one moon. It's probably all I'll need to beat a fan girl…" Temari said in an even voice. Sakura once again charged and was again blown backwards by wind.

"Forehead is so screwed." Naruto muttered. Anko grunted her agreement. Naruto noticed that his mother was angry, and he knew why. She despised kunoichi who played fan girl and used make up instead of honing their skills as shinobi.

"But the Suna girl is kinda hot." Naruto smiled, and received a smack on the back of his head.

"Shut up, and watch." Anko growled.

"But she's a good fighter and I like them feisty." This time he got a punch.

"Shut. Up." Anko sounded dangerous. They turned back just in time to see Sakura smack the wall, and she fell over. She didn't move and Hayate declared Temari the winner. After the medics picked up the unconscious fan girl everyone looked to the screen. It stopped on two names.

"Sasuke Uchiha and Rock Lee come down here please." Hayate coughed out. _Oh this ought to be good. Gai's star student, vs Sasuke._ Naruto thought.

The two boys came down.

"I wish you luck, Sasuke!" Lee shouted as he took his taijutsu stance.

"The same to you." Sasuke nodded.

"Begin!" Hayate shouted out. Sasuke activated his sharingan and he and Lee both charged. The two genin began throwing punches and blocking at a pace that was almost ridiculous. Sasuke had his sharingan, but Lee had speed that was hard to follow even for the experienced shinobi in the room. So both were evenly matched until Sasuke delivered a hard kick to Lee's chest. Lee impacted the wall and cratered it.

"Lee! Take them!" Gai shouted.

"Really, Gai-sensei!?" Lee shouted in excitement.

"Yes, I give you permission."

Lee grinned like a kid who just got a new toy, and jumped to the head of the statue above the jounin and kage. He sat down and took off some ankle weights.

"Ankle weights? They can't make that much of a difference can they?" Naruto raised an eyebrow. Anko shook her head. Lee dropped them, and Anko and Naruto had to steady each other. The amount of smoke thrown into the air caused those gathered to cough. Anko and Naruto looked up, but Lee had disappeared. They heard something smash into concrete. They turned to see Sasuke getting out of a crater. Lee was standing in the center of the floor, and waited for Sasuke. The Uchiha charged only to receive a blow which knocked him to the floor. Lee resumed his spot, but Sasuke raised his hand.

"Proctor, I forfeit. There's no way I can match his speed." Sasuke sounded disappointed. Hayate nodded and declared Lee the winner of the match. Naruto nodded in approval.

"At least he knows when it's hopeless." Naruto whispered.

"He could have gone on a little longer. We don't know how long Lee can keep up that speed level." Anko commented. Naruto shrugged.

"True."

Hayate's voice rang out.

"Next is Kiba Inuzuka vs Gaara of the Desert."

"I forfeit!" Kiba shouted.

"Gaara is the winner by default."

The board ran through the names again and Hayate shouted.

"Ino Yamanaka vs Tenten Higurashi." Both kunoichi came to the floor.

"I don't really want to hurt you Ino, please forfeit." Tenten raised her eyebrows at the blonde.

"Not in front of Sasuke-kun!" Ino stamped her foot. Tenten sighed and pulled out scroll, she unsealed a ninjato and pointed it towards Ino.

"Begin!" Hayate jumped backwards. Tenten charged Ino, dodging in several different directions so as not to allow the Yamanaka to use the Mind Switch Jutsu. Ino cursed and pulled out a kunai and ran forward to meet the weapons user.

"Bad mistake, Ino." Naruto commented.

"Yep." Anko grinned waiting for the inevitable knock out. The blonde thrust the kunai towards Tenten, but the Higurashi simply knocked it out of the way with her ninjato, and slammed the end into Ino's stomach. Ino stumbled past Tenten, her breath knocked out of her. Tenten grabbed a handful of the blonde's hair and slammed the fan girl to the ground. Ino looked up to see a blade to her throat.

"Forfeit, Ino…" Tenten said. Ino raised her hand.

"I yield."

Hayate nodded.

"Winner is Tenten Higurashi by default." Tenten sealed the blade and reached down to help up Ino.

"Next is Hinata Hyuuga vs Neji Hyuuga, as a precaution the Hokage as declared the use of the Caged Bird Seal illegal in this fight."

Naruto shivered. This was going to get nasty. Both pale eyed Konoha-nin went down to the floor.

"Hinata-sama, forfeit, you have no chance of beating me." Neji smugly told the Main House Hyuuga.

"I'm afraid not, Neji-nii-san. Byakugan!"

Anko sneered at that word. She still hadn't forgiven the Hyuuga for attacking Naruto. Neji activated his kekkei genkai as well, and the two Hyuuga charged each other, and the fight was over as quickly as it began. Neji delivered a solid gentle fist thrust to Hinata's chest. The girl gasped and fell to the ground, while spitting up blood. The branch house Hyuuga turned his back to her and began walking away. Hayate was about to call the match in favor of Neji, when Hinata began getting back up. Neji turned to see this and sneered.

"Stay down. You have no hope of beating me. It was fate for me to defeat you."

Hinata smiled weakly "That's where you're wrong Neji-nii-san. It is you who have no chance of defeating me."

"Don't talk down to me!" Neji shouted.

"You shouldn't talk down to others either Neji-nii-san, it makes the Hyuuga look bad."

Neji yelled out in rage, and began to charge the helpless girl. Hayate shouted

"Neji, no! The match is over!" but the Hyuuga boy wasn't stopping.

Kiba watched with wide eyes as the enraged Hyuuga charged his friend. Then he was stopped. Everyone's eyes widened as they saw, Naruto, Anko, Kakashi, Asuma, and Gai, all standing around Neji. Hayate was standing between Hinata and Neji with his hand extended. If Neji had made it any farther then he would have been knocked backwards by the jounin. Naruto, was crouched and had his hand against the Hyuuga's stomach. Anko was standing behind Neji with her snakes wrapped around his ankles. Asuma and Kakashi were standing to either side of him holding his arms. Gai was standing next to Anko.

"Neji, you promised me you wouldn't let this Main House thing get the better of you."

Neji sneered at him in return, and after Anko released him, Gai forced Neji back to his sport by Team Gai. Everyone turned to walk away, but Naruto coughed and collapsed.

"Naruto!" Anko ran over.

"I'm fine, I just need to be more careful." Naruto winced.

"Bullshit. You're sitting this time, whether you like it or not." Naruto leaned on his mother and she dragged him over to the chair where she sat him down, and sat on his legs forcing him to stay where he was. Naruto sighed in acceptance, that he was going to stay down. Anko turned and saw a hint of red coming through his bandages. She raised her voice.

"Hayate! I'm taking Naruto back to the clinic, his wounds are acting up." She called over a couple chunin who picked him up between the two of them. As they passed Hayate he whispered

"Get to feeling better, kid, it's depressing to see you moody, and sad."

Naruto smiled weakly as they took him from the room.

**Reviews are appreciated. Expect Team Psycho later tonight.**


	13. Team Thirteen

**I don't own Naruto.**

**Sorry for the slow updates.**

**Warning you now. **

**WEAK CHAPTER!**

**As Always**

**Enjoy :D**

_With the Suna team._

"Weakling." Kankuro commented.

"Kankuro, unlike you the man is a chunin, and recovered wounds that I doubt anyone else would survive." Baki scolded the puppet user.

"He was able to move that far and that fast without his crutches. Did you hear how badly hurt he was? I'm amazed he's alive, let alone, standing up." Temari took her sensei's side.

"I want to fight him…"Gaara whispered.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. He's a Konoha-nin he can't be all that great." The puppet user suddenly found a female ANBU standing next to him. She had long purple hair that came to her waist.

"I'd appreciate it if you'd stop talking about Naruto that way. He achieved his skill level through hard work and determination. Once you've done the same, then, you can trash talk." And then she was gone before Baki could protest at the ANBU's behavior.

"Will Shikamaru Nara, Chouji Akimichi, and Maki Nara, come to the floor please? At the same time with the Kiri team, Fu Veria, Akiko Veria, and Mu Tsuruji. Come to the floor. In the interest of time these two teams will fight all at once. Whichever team wins shall go to the finals. Begin!" Hayate jumped backwards.

Shikamaru, and Maki each crouched and sent their shadows sliding across the floor, while Chouji us his family's expansion jutsu. The Kiri team had been ready for this however and immediately moved to dodge the shadows, however two of them Fu, and Akiko were driven backwards by Chouji, and captured by Shikamaru and Maki. Mu however was not captured and moved to fight the two Nara in hand to hand. Maki, the more experienced of the two, stood up and ran forward, while Shikamaru held down Fu. Chouji slammed into the two immobilized Kiri-nin and Shikamaru and Chouji moved to support their hard pressed teammate.

It was clear that Mu was the most experienced of all four, and was holding off the three Konoha genin with relative ease. She began formed handsigns and called out

"Ninja Art: Hidden Mist Jutsu." And a thick mist began forming on the training floor.

* * *

_Tower of Death Clinic._

"I'm fine!"Naruto spat.

"No you aren't, you idiot! You fought Orochimaru!" Anko fired back

"Why does that matter? I blew _myself _up!"

"Oh, because that makes _everything_ ok!"

"Why shouldn't it? My arm is back and I only collapsed because I didn't have my crutches!"

"Yeah, and then blood started shooting out of your chest!"

"It was shooting, it was simply wetting the bandages some…"Naruto deadpanned.

"It's the same thing to me!" Anko sounded a little distressed

"Why do you care!?" Naruto shouted in Anko's face. Then he was surprised when Anko teared up.

"Because you're my kid, and I promised to protect you once, and I've let you get hurt badly twice now…" the tears ran down her face.

"Both of which were my fault not yours…"Naruto was quiet.

"But I _promised_ to protect you Naruto…" Anko sobbed a little bit. Naruto hugged his mom.

"But I'm fine mom. We both know that you can't protect me _all_ the time. I am a shinobi after all. You've trained me into a kick ass ninja, and that alone has saved my life more than once." Naruto whispered in his mom's ear. It didn't seem to console his mom.

"Besides, I'm technically an adult, at least in the eyes of the village. You don't have to protect me anymore. Let me keep _my_ promise and protect you instead."

Anko pulled back and Naruto smiled. Her tears dried up, and Naruto stood up without the use of his crutches.

"Now let's go see which of the brat's got through to the finals." And the two Mitarashi left. Unknown to them, a certain white haired pervert was standing in the corner of the room.

"Those two have got to be some of the most emotional people on the face of the earth…"Jiraiya mused before following after them.

* * *

_Tower of Death, Training Room_

Mu finally fell to the three huffing Konoha genin. It had taken complex planning from Shikamaru, and Maki, the Kiri-nin made the mistake of insulting Chouji's weight. While she was busy dodging the enraged bull of a genin, Maki and Shikamaru were able to capture her in a shadow possession and finish her.

"Winners, Konoha Team Ten."

"Hey, congratulations guys." Naruto and Anko strode in hands in their pockets. Naruto walked up to the stage next to the Hokage, and stood next to him when he stepped forward to address the winners. The Hokage went over the schedule for the Finals and explained the month's time reprieve. But the Konoha genin were staring at Naruto who acted as if nothing was wrong with his appearance. He, Anko, and the other jounin on stage were wearing headsets which began to hiss with static that only came on when someone was activating their speakers.

_"This is ANBU Team Four. Unidentified individual approaching the Tower of Death. Jounin chakra level."_

Naruto keyed his microphone.

_"This is Naruto. Understood, moving to investigate." _ Naruto patted Yugao's shoulder as well as Hayate's and the trio disappeared. Ibiki and Anko disappeared seconds later. Tenten whispered to Lee.

"What's going on?"

"I don't know, but it must be unyouthful for all of the proctors and jounin to disappear."

* * *

The five shinobi stood in the entrance hall to the Tower and waited for the intruder to enter. Yugao and Hayate stood on either side of the door, and Naruto, Ibiki, and Anko stood in front. A Sound jounin entered.

"Oh my. Am I unwelcome here?" he said in a surprised voice. Naruto and Anko narrowed their eyes at the pale skin and smooth voice.

"Oh no, our allies from the Sound are always welcome, but I'd like to point out that you've missed the preliminaries." Yugao answered cordially.

"Oh. That's unfortunate. I'll just go see to the state of my students." The jounin walked on, while every Konoha-nin glared at his back in disgust.

* * *

"Kukukuku, so young Naruto survived after all. This should be interesting." Orochimaru smirked as he walked through the tower.

* * *

_Back with Hiruzen Sarutobi and Jiraiya_

"Each of you will now take a card and read off the number you get_. _This will determine who you fight in the final exams." Hayate stepped forward and each of the genin took a number from the box her proffered.

"1." Shikamaru mumbled

"2." Neji nodded

"3" Temari shrugged

"4" Lee announced

"5" Tenten looked at her card

"6" Chouji munched

"7" Gaara mumbled

"8" Kankuro blinked

"You'll be given a month to train. Dismissed." Jiraiya and Sarutobi disappeared.

* * *

_Hokage's Office_

Anko slammed the door and sat down in a chair, crossing her legs.

"You know you're supposed to knock before you come in here Anko." Jiraiya looked up from where he was writing a transcript.

"And secretaries aren't supposed to gossip about my kid and I." Anko fired back.

"I know right. I hate that bitch." Naruto leaned on the wall next to the window he'd just come through. He was back in his characteristic outfit, black trench coat and all. He was messing with his hair though. It, much like Anko's hair, was falling in front of his face, and his attempts to fix it weren't helping at all.

"Gah! Mom, help me with this!" the chunin shouted

Anko laughed and got up to help her son. She untied his headband and tied Naruto's on much like her own, with it holding up his bangs, almost hiding the headband.

"God, how can you deal with this…" Naruto groused. Jiraiya coughed.

"Oh, sorry, Ero-Hokage. What's up? We were in the middle of a drinking session." Anko sat back down. Sarutobi entered the office and, once again, laughed the resemblance between Naruto and his mother.

"Well Sarutobi-sensei and I were talking, and we figured that with Orochimaru in the village it isn't wise to have shinobi just doing nothing. So we're grouping any genin that lost team members to the Chunin Exams into impromptu genin squads. You and Naruto will be leading Team Thirteen." Jiraiya explained from behind his desk.

"_What!_ I have to deal with _two_ more brats!" Anko shouted making Naruto snicker.

"That's the last straw squirt, I'm not paying off your ramen tab."

"But, moooom!" Naruto groaned.

"Nope. You made fun of me." Anko stuck her tongue out at Naruto. Sarutobi and Jiraiya just watched the exchange and wondered how two shinobi could be so deadly, and yet, so immature.

"Oh _real_ mature, mom." Naruto rolled his eyes.

"I'm telling Yugao and Genma they can put their sake on your tab at Dangoya." Anko grinned.

"I give! Alright…Ero-sannin who are we getting on our team?" Naruto raised his hands in surrender.

Kiba and Sasuke burst in the door.

"Kiba, you stink! Take a shower!" Sasuke shouted.

"Don't get grumpy with me. It's not my fault your eye infection didn't help you out against Lee." Kiba fired back.

"Don't call the sharingan and eye infection!" Sasuke shouted. Kiba was about to respond when something wrapped around both boys' mouths. Anko and Naruto both had their arms extended and snakes were keeping the boys from talking.

"Shhh…." Naruto put a finger to his mouth. Sasuke and Kiba nodded and the snakes retreated back into Naruto's and Anko's trench coats. Jiraiya was staring at Naruto, while Sarutobi looked to Anko.

"Anko when did Naruto sign the snake contract?" Jiraiya raised an eyebrow, and Anko grinned sadistically

* * *

_FLASHBACK_

_Naruto entered the Tower of Death. He'd thought about going into the village, but October 10__th__ wasn't the best day for the Kyuubi jinchurikii to walk around. A drunk wasn't smart enough to realize that Anko would tear them apart if they touched a hair on Naruto's head. The lights were completely off, and Naruto raised an eyebrow before flipping on the lights._

_"Happy birthday!" a group of people shouted while Naruto blinked. Ibiki, Iruka, Yugao, and Kakashi were gathered around a table with a cake sitting on it. Off to the side was Sasuke, Kiba, and Tenten. Snoring that Naruto assumed to be Shika could be heard from behind the couch._

_"Squirt, I'd like to enter my apartment if you don't mind. Happy birthday by the way." Anko tapped him on the shoulder from behind. Naruto just turned and hugged his mom. The others raised an eyebrow at this._

_"It's his first birthday with other people." _

_This sobered the others, and Shikamaru sat up and yawned._

_"Let's get started." And he threw a gift wrapped box to Naruto. He opened it and found a small bag of powder inside._

_"That's my family's wound ointment. Just put it in some water and spread where you're hurt."_

_Kiba was up next. He handed over a dog whistle that he explained would allow Naruto to call for help from the Inuzuka. Sasuke threw him a Demon Wind Shuriken with a kanji on each of the blades._

_"You can channel elemental chakra into it." _

_Tenten walked up and handed Naruto a pair of trench knives._

_"These are from me and my entire family. Heat tempered steel." And she went and sat down next to Kiba. Yugao tossed him a katana, Kakashi threw him an orange book. Anko snatched it and asked for the real present. Kakashi eye smiled and handed him a set of ANBU shuriken. Ibiki presented him with a set of T&I poisons, and Iruka gave him a pair of three-pronged kunai. The jounin recognized the kunai, raised their eyebrows, but didn't say anything._

_"These are from Hokage-sama and me." _

_"Now it's my turn squirt." Anko grinned and bit her thumb._

_"Summoning Jutsu!" a scroll appeared beneath her hand in a burst of smoke. _

_"This is the Snake Contract, squirt." Anko rolled it out on the table. Naruto grinned excitedly, and bit his thumb. His wrote his name beneath his mother's, and noted the name just before Anko's struck out in a line of blood, and snake venom. Anko rolled the scroll back up and a snake appeared in its place._

_"Ssssso this is our new ssssummoner? Your sssson is adequate Anko-sssssama." The black python hissed out. Anko grinned and the snake nodded and disappeared._

_FLASHBACK END_

* * *

"Wait…you gave your kid a _summoning contract_ for his birthday?" Jiraiya was incredulous.

"Why not? My kid gets the best I've got." Anko blinked. Jiraiya was a bit disappointed. He'd been planning on giving Naruto the Toad Contract.

"Nothing wrong with it. But now, back to business. Anko Mitarashi, Naruto Mitarashi, Sasuke Uchiha, Kiba Inuzuka, from this point forward you are Team Thirteen. As you have both a chunin and jounin in your squad you'll be taking higher end C-Ranks. Now get out of my office I have paperwork to do, and Sarutobi-sensei refuses to teach me the Paperwork Murder Jutsu that the Yondaime taught him. Here take this." Jiraiya threw them a scroll marked with a red **C** and turned back to his paperwork. Team Thirteen left the office, and Jiraiya sighed.

"It's unfortunate that we have to get those two out of the village."

"Naruto _blew himself up _to kill Orochimaru, and, as much as I trust Anko, when it comes to Orochimaru she loses her head." Sarutobi shook his head, and turned to a noise in the street. Anko and Naruto were screaming at each other and Sasuke and Kiba were rolling a dust cloud in which fists and kunai could be seen. The civilians were all staring and Sarutobi couldn't help but laugh at the team's antics.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'll start updating this more. I just got lost on the path of life. Yes I actually said that. Now what really happened was I was writing FMA fanfics lol. Kind of got burned out on Naruto fanfics for a while. **


	14. Getting to know the team

**I don't own Naruto.**

**Thanks for the awesome response to the last chapter. Two chapters today!**

**As Always**

**Enjoy :D**

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"Ok, noobs, I know you two, but since we're _technically_ genin squad we have to go through the formalities. So I'll go first." Anko leaned against a tree in Training Ground Seven. Naruto was in the tree above her munching on some dango, and Sasuke and Kiba were sitting on the ground glaring at each other.

"I'm Anko Mitarashi. I like Naruto, practicing my ninjutsu, Dango, and my genin squad. My goal is to become chief of T&I as soon as Ibiki will let me. I don't like the Snake-teme that hurt me, and now I hate him hundred times more because he hurt my kid. My dream is to kill the snake-teme. Squirt you next." Anko looked up at Naruto who swallowed the last of his dango and threw the stick, completing a Konoha symbol.

"Two and half minutes mom. That beat your record by five seconds." Naruto grinned as he hit a stop watch. Anko growled and said something about "We'll see how long your record stands…"

"Ok, down to business. I'm Naruto Mitarashi. I like my mom, ramen, and practicing my assassination techniques. My goal is to become a respected member of ANBU T&I, of which I am a rookie member. I don't like people who can't see the difference between a kunai and the sealing scroll, or people who look down on me and my mom. I _hate _Orochimaru-teme and everything associated with him. My dream is to kill Orochimaru-teme. Very slowly." Naruto grinned at his dumbfounded friends. Sasuke coughed and stood up.

"I'm Sasuke Uchiha. I like the ones close to me. I don't like anything I have a reason not to. My goal is to protect the friends I have left. I don't have a dream, but I do have an ambition that I _will_ make a reality. I'm going to kill my brother and restore my clan." Sasuke sat back down. Kiba stood up.

"I'm Kiba Inuzuka. I like Akamaru, my friends, and practicing my ninjutsu. I don't like cats. My goal is to become the head of the Inuzuka Clan. My dream is to be the best clan head I can be for the Inuzuka clan."

Anko nodded.

"Ok. You two tell me your skill sets. Me and Naruto will _show_ you ours in a second." Anko blinked.

"I know several fire jutsu the most powerful being the Dragon fire Jutsu. I have the Stage Two sharingan."

"I have my clan taijutsu, and I have average training as a tracker."

"Alright, here's the deal. I'm making us into a hunter-nin squad. So me and Naruto are the hunted. You guys are the hunters. Find me and the squirt and I treat you to whatever dinner you want. Don't find us by sundown and you have to find us in the Forest of Death, _our_ home turf. You can't go home until you find us. Come at us with the intent to kill. Let's go squirt."

And the two Mitarashi disappeared in a pair of body flickers.

"What just happened…"Kiba looked at Sasuke.

"They got us to tell them our weaknesses and then they decided to test our aptitude as hunter-nin." Sasuke sighed and got up.

"Your nose smell anything?" Sasuke looked around. Kiba and Akamaru sniffed the air.

"Think they smell like snakes?" Kiba looked at his teammate.

"Probably."

"Well then we head east." The two genin jumped away.

* * *

Sasuke and Kiba crept up on the hollow tree, and stormed inside

"_gotcha! _Oh no…" Kiba shouted and then backed away from the pissed off viper. Sasuke and Kiba tripped over each other trying to get out of the tree and found and note on the ground.

_LOL-Anko and Naruto_

Kiba crushed the note and sniffed the air again.

"They've disguised their scent. I'm getting the scent of snake from nearly every direction.

Sasuke had an idea.

"Smell for Anko-sensei's pheromones. Look for dango and ramen as well."

Kiba sniffed the air again. Then he turned and threw a kunai straight up into the tree.

_Clang_

Anko and Naruto fell to the ground.

"Not bad. But you still have to capture us." Naruto and Anko took up taijutsu stances when Sasuke and Kiba charged them. Kiba got into a match with Anko and Sasuke jumped at Naruto with his interceptor style. It was a good match up. These two had tied for rookie of the year, and the Interceptor Style was a good counter to the Hebi Style. Naruto had one distinct advantage though. The metal plate on his boots impacted Sasuke's stomach and the Uchiha doubled over. Naruto backhanded him and the metal plate on his fingerless gloves left a square shaped impression on Sasuke.

The Uchiha was stunned, but not out of the fight. He shook his head, and grinned.

"Just like old times, huh?"

"Almost." Naruto grinned and thrust out his arm.

"Striking Shadow Snake!" and four pairs of vipers wrapped around Sasuke's ankles.

"Crap…" was all Sasuke had to say. Naruto hurled the Uchiha at a tree where he landed next to Kiba. The assassination specialist stuck his hands in his pockets and walked over to his mom.

"What do you think?" Anko looked at her son.

"I think with a little training they could become good hunter-nin. They picked up on our game really quickly. We'd be a close combat heavy squad, though."

"I agree. So where should we take them for dinner?"

"Dangoya?" Naruto shrugged.

"Sure." They each picked up an unconscious genin and flickered away.

* * *

_Dangoya Nightfall_

Sasuke sat up and looked around. He was in Dangoya. Kiba was drooling on the table, still unconscious. A note and stack of money was stuck to the table with a kunai.

_We said you had to find us. You did. Here's your dinner money, spend it well._

_Anko and Naruto_

Sasuke looked up at the raucous laughter coming from the jounin booth. An apparently knee knocking drunk Naruto, and Genma were playing patty-cake. On top of the table. At least they _were_ on top of the table until a purple haired kunoichi Sasuke didn't know and Anko grabbed their ankles and jerked them out from under the men. Naruto ended up on the floor, and Genma rolled over the booth seat and into a civilian woman's lap.

"Owie…. "Naruto sat up only to receive Genma's midsection to the face when the woman threw him off. The two shinobi fell to the floor, and Naruto pushed Genma off, and sat up.

"Ugh…not cool Yugao…" then he got up and crawled over the table back to his seat next to Anko.

"It's still creepy how alike you two look now." Yugao pointed at the pair of Mitarashis.

"Aw, but two is always better than one!" Anko put her arm around Naruto's neck. Yugao shook her head, and Anko deadpanned.

"Don't be jealous because his pecs are bigger than your rack." Naruto and Anko ducked the sake battle that flew their way and it hit Sasuke full on in the face. He conked out and his forehead hit the table.

* * *

_Twenty Minutes Later_

Sasuke sat up and looked at the jounin booth.

"Go, go, go, go, go!" Genma Anko and a new face, Kakashi, were pounding the table as Naruto and Yugao threw back shots of sake. Naruto keeled over. Yugao stood up and took a wad of bills from the center of the table. Something hit him in the back of the head, and he blacked out again.

* * *

_Thirty Minutes Later_

The jounin booth was empty when Sasuke woke up the third time. Kiba and the money were gone to. Suddenly there were whistles and cat calls coming from the bar. The Uchiha turned to see Naruto and Yugao making out on the bar.

"Drunk as hell…" a chunin across from Sasuke noted. The pair of gate guards nodded.

"Think they'll remember this?" Izumo asked.

"No." Kotetsu shook his head.

"Hey Yugao what the hell! That's my kid!" A drunken Anko yelled from the doorway to the woman's restroom. Kakashi and Genma were in the crowd throwing money at the pair. Anko picked up a sake bottle and threw it at the duo. They still had enough of their shinobi reflexes to duck it. It hit an Ame-nin here for the chunin exams.

"What the hell!" he stood up and yelled.

"Oh, stop whining." Anko shrugged. The Ame-nin walked over to Anko.

"Apologize you bitch!" the Ame jounin shouted in Anko's face.

"Fuck you!" Anko punched out the guy, and his team stood up to go after her. A certain black trench coated Konoha-nin impacted the back of one, and Anko dropped another. One thing led to another and before long a bar brawl was in full swing. The owner of Dangoya ran outside and shouted for help. He wasn't trained to stop a bar fight between shinobi.

* * *

As a result of the commotion, Hayate Gekko broke off tailing that Kabuto kid to help with the suppression of the fight. He pulsed his chakra and a pair of ANBU took it up.

Kabuto smirked as the Konoha-nin broke off, and headed for his rendezvous point with Baki. The plan was going off without a hitch. Of course, the arrogant teenager didn't notice the pair of ANBU.

* * *

_The Next Morning_

"No one was killed, but there were four broken bones, and multiple lacerations from weapons." A chunin read off a list of injuries. Jiraiya rolled his eyes, and sighed.

"We have an S-Rank missing-nin somewhere in the village and our shinobi are to busy starting bar fights to guard our borders. Who started it?"

"It appears a confrontation between an Ame jounin and Anko Mitarashi started it. Anko threw the first punch. The Ame-nin's team went after her, and Naruto Mitarashi went after them, and things just got worse from there."

"Bring me every Konoha-nin who was involved in this fight."

The chunin nodded and flickered away. Before long the trench coat wearing duo were in the Hokage's office, along with Kakashi, Yugao, and Genma. All five were at attention, unlike when they usually relaxed around Jiraiya. They were in deep shit…

Jiraiya stared the five. Anko had a black eye, but was otherwise uninjured. Naruto had a split lip and a cut across his cheek. Kakashi, as usual, was completely uninjured. Genma was missing a tooth, and Yugao didn't appear to be injured.

"You five are some of my most trusted shinobi, and you go and do this! Anko, Naruto! I gave you a team yesterday! How can I trust you two to train genin when you get into bar brawls?! Kakashi! You have genin entering the chunin exam finals! Why were you out drinking?! Genma you are Sarutobi-sensei's personal bodyguard, and yet you go out and do something like this? Yugao you are an ANBU captain! You should be the most mature out of all of them! You should all be ashamed of yourselves!"

The five just took the tirade. It was rare, but when Jiraiya got angry, hell hath no fury…

"Anko! What the hell happened anyway? Why did you confront this Ame-nin?" Jiraiya wound down. Yugao and Naruto, remembering what happened, swallowed and turned a bit red.

"Well I caught Yugao and Naruto making out on the bar, and heaved a sake bottle at them…" Anko shrugged.

"Wait back up…Naruto was making out with Yugao?" Jiraiya looked at the ANBU and assassination specialist, both of whom were redder than before. The Hokage seemed to have some kind of newfound respect in his eyes when he looked at Naruto.

"Yeah…we were both really drunk, and..."Naruto shifted uneasily. Yugao nodded, embarrassed. And then Naruto felt eyes on his back. He turned and Hayate was standing there, glaring at Naruto.

"Ok, whoa, everyone calm down for a second…" Jiraiya stopped this before it began.

"Hokage-sama! I request that I be able to talk alone with Hayate!" Naruto came to attention and became serious. Anko and Yugao looked like they were going to protest, but the Jiraiya nodded, and Naruto left the room with Hayate still glaring at his back. They went upstairs and disappeared towards Training Ground Seven.

* * *

_Training Ground Seven_

Naruto stood against a tree and looked at Hayate.

"Alright. Do whatever you please." Naruto shrugged

The glare disappeared and the kenjutsu master blinked at Naruto.

"What…"

"I kissed your lover. This is the part where you roast my nuts over an open fire." Naruto explained.

"You were drunk…"

"And? I still did it. So, Hayate, hit me, or else I'll go and kiss her again."

This time a fist impacted his face.

"Ok, now you hit me for hitting you." Hayate leaned forward.

Naruto punched Hayate in the face. Hayate kneed him in his stomach and Naruto doubled over.

"There, we're even. Now let's go make sure Yugao-chan realizes I'm not as pissed as I should be." Hayate coughed. They disappeared in a pair of flickers.

* * *

_Hokage's Office_

Naruto and Hayate both had a black eye when he and Hayate reentered the office. Yugao flinched at their appearances.

"Did you work that out."

"Oh yeah, nothing a good fight didn't fix. Hayate feels better and I don't feel guilty anymore." Naruto laughed. Jiraiya smirked shook his head, and looked to Naruto.

"As I just finished explaining to your co-consipiritors in this bar fight, I'm fining you each 100,000 ryo, and you need to pay for the damages to Dangoya."

"Deal." Naruto figured out they were getting off easy.

"Fine. Now get out of my office, you hung over morons." Jiraiya shook his head. The shinobi laughed and left in a group.

* * *

Hayate and Yugao walked side by side, and Anko and Naruto were laughing as they pieced together what had happened last night. Kakashi was walking by himself and giggling intermittently at the orange book in his hand. Genma whistled low and slow. Everyone looked at where he was pointing and flinched.

Dangoya was, in a word, trashed…

Naruto spotted four kunai in the walls, all of the windows were smashed and the tables were shattered.

"Wow…you guys messed that place up…" Hayate blinked at the destruction. The other shinobi nodded in agreement.

"So…anyone up for a drink?" Genma shook his head and smirked as a resounding "NO!" came from his four companions.

* * *

_With Sasuke and Kiba_

The pair of genin observed their friend standing with the four jounin observing the destruction in Dangoya.

"You said Naruto, Anko, and their pals did that?" Kiba leaned against a wall.

"Yeah. It was them against these Ame-nin, and the Ame-nin were _so_ outmatched."

"Then why do Hayate-sensei and Naruto both have a black eye?"

"Those are new." Sasuke shrugged.

"Since when does Naruto hang out with the jounin anyway?" Kiba blinked.

"He has ever since we graduated. Besides, what with his, uh, new look…he fits in with them."

Kiba nodded.

"Let's go find everyone else." Sasuke turned and walked away.

* * *

_Back with Naruto and the Jounin_

"Uh, I feel like we should go apologize or, something…" Naruto looked at Anko, who shrugged.

"We're paying for the repairs. Screw it." Anko walked away. The others nodded. A chunin strode up to Anko and Naruto.

"Anko-san, Naruto-san, you guys are needed at T&I. Yugao-san, Hayate-san, Genma-san, Sandaime-sama has requested your presence at the Sarutobi compound. Kakashi-san Jiraiya-sama would like to see you in his office." The chunin addressed everyone in the group. They nodded their goodbyes and each disappeared towards their different destinations.

**Reviews are appreciated.**


	15. Revelations

**I don't own Naruto. **

**Shorter one, since this is just explaining the next few chapters.**

**If you want more I demand waffles and bacon. Plenty of peanut butter and syrup.**

**Spontaneous thing since the whole NarutoxTenten thing is kind of mess up, anyone want NarutoxKurotsuchi? Or NarutoxTemari? NaruYugao? NaruHana?**

**Vote in reviews or PM me**

**NOW THEN I GO TO SLEEP! I'll BE EXPECTING WAFFLES AND BACON WHEN I AWAKE!**

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**!WARNING:SCENES OF TORTURE AND GORE!**

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**As Always**

**Enjoy :D**

Chapter 15: Revelations

_ANBU Torture and Interrogations_

Ibiki met the pair of Mitarashis at the front gate of the building. They walked through a gate in a fence that was topped with razor wire. There was another fence beyond that, and in the middle was a double layer of concertina wire. A pair of ANBU with Inuzuka nin-dogs patrolled the perimeter as well. A large concrete building was behind these defenses, and another pair of ANBU guarded the front door. All three trench coated figures walked in after flashing their IDs. The building was clearly soundproofed because soon as one entered screams could be heard.

"An ANBU patrol picked up a traitor last night. The details are highly classified, but apparently there is a plot to invade Konoha. I'll take charge. You two get physical only once I tell you to." The Mitarashis nodded, and opened the door to see Kabuto Yakushi bound to a rope hung from the ceiling in the center of the room. He grinned smugly when Naruto, Anko, and Ibiki walked into the room. A couple medics and ANBU stood in the corner should Kabuto try to kill himself.

"Ah, Naruto and Anko Mitarashi. Orochimaru-sama sends his regards."

Anko and Naruto both delivered a punch to his face for that. Anko kicked him in his manhood and Naruto kneed him in his diaphragm.

"Enough, you two." Ibiki growled when Anko put a kunai close the Kabuto's jugular. Anko and Naruto returned to Ibiki's side and glared at Kabuto. Ibiki began to speak in monotone.

"Yakushi, we're going to be asking you some questions. Answer them without struggle, and you die quickly. There will be no negotiations. Now then, what was your purpose here?"

Kabuto snickered.

"I was here for the Konoha chunin exams just like everyone else."

Ibiki shook his head and sighed.

"You lie to us, we hurt you."

Naruto shoved a jug of water into Kabuto's mouth and forced him to drink. After the quart jog was nearly empty, Anko kicked Kabuto in the stomach, forcing the medic to regurgitate the liquid. Ibiki look Kabuto in the eyes.

"Who were you meeting with last night?"

"I was going to Ichiraku Ramen to meet up with that cute Ayame girl."

Ibiki just shook his head and looked at the pair to the side.

Anko and Naruto removed a pair of kunai from a pile of coals. The blades were red hot. Kabuto couldn't help, but gulp as the two Mitarashis came close. The smell of burning flesh and sound of blistering skin filled the room as the torture continued.

* * *

_Sarutobi Compound_

The jounin were on their knees before Hiruzen Sarutobi. The Third Hokage began speaking.

"I've called you all here for a very special reason. As you know Orochimaru is in the village. He has already damaged us considerably. Naruto was marked with a cursed seal, and Anko now knows of his presence. A number of ANBU were killed during our pursuit of him, and now we have evidence of a plot by Suna and Orochimaru to invade us simultaneously. Even worse, we have traitors in our midst. In response I'm organizing teams of chunin led by jounin to patrol our borders. The Fire Daimyo is sealing the borders of the Land of Fire as we speak. Suna will be allowed entrance, but will be ambushed by a large group of our own shinobi not far inside the country. Anko, Yugao, and Hayate will be leading that group. They will pick their personal teams, and I'll be giving them three battalions of chunin of my own selection. All other jounin will remain in the village. Further planning will take place during the interim period before the Third Exam. Once Anko is done with her interrogation at T&I she'll join us here to pick her team. She'll then leave immediately for the Fire/Wind border. Hayate will follow tomorrow, and Yugao will follow the day after with a squad disguised as ANBU. The reinforcement battalions will be selected and sortied in secret several days before the chunin exams. Yugao, think about who you want on your team. Hayate you as well. Genma I want you pass this information to the people on this list." Hiruzen finished and the three special jounin looked at him with wide eyes, before nodding, and leaving. The Third Hokage shook his head.

"Why must the young suffer for the mistakes of the old?" the veteran of three wars sighed as he turned to a book with the names of every chunin that had taken at least one mission

* * *

_Jiraiya's Office_

Jiraiya activated the Level 10 silence seals on the room. These had been layered by Minato Namikaze himself, and there were none like them anywhere else in the world. The white haired pervert turned to the masked jounin in front of him.

"Kakashi, we have a situation…" Jiraiya explained the invasion, and the capture of Kabuto, and the plan to deal with Suna.

"Sarutobi-sensei and I will be busy with Orochimaru and the Kazekage, so I'm putting you in charge of dealing with the Suna and Oto shinobi already within the village. We estimate there to be around 150 of them, with twenty or so being jounin. You'll lose fifteen shinobi of Yugao's, Anko's, and Hayate's choice, and three battalions of chunin, but you'll be left with every genin, most of the chunin, and all the jounin except those three. Danzo will be commanding the ROOT and ANBU forces, but they'll be clearing the borders of the village, and guarding the elders."

Kakashi took in this information, and looked away from his book.

"Have Anko, Yugao, and Hayate made their choice yet?"

"No, but I'm sure Anko will be taking Naruto. Yugao will most likely request her ANBU squad, but I'm not sure if I'll let her have them or not. I honestly don't know who Hayate will want."

Kakashi filed this away.

"Anything else?"

"I want to know where your CP will be set up and all that in a week. I also want your choice of troops commanders, but keep in mind Anko, Yugao, and Hayate get first pick."

Kakashi nodded and flickered out of the office.

* * *

_ANBU Torture and Interrogations_

Kabuto now hung limp, and could only mumble out his answers. His skin was cut and blistered. The medic's eyes were swollen shut, and blood dripped to the floor beneath him. He had also become a lot less creative and smug.

Ibiki stood with his arms behind his back, while Anko stood behind Kabuto. Naruto was leaning on a table. Both Mitarashis had removed their trench coats and stood there in their mesh shirts.

"I'll ask again, Yakushi. Who is leading the Suna contingent?"

"Get fucked…"

"Not terribly original." Ibiki nodded to Anko.

Anko charged a pair of metal rods with lightning chakra and shoved them against Kabuto's back. The medic jerked and twitched as electricity coursed through his body.

"Kabuto, the pain can stop anytime, you just need to cooperate." Ibiki leaned down to look Kabuto in the face. Kabuto shook his head, and Naruto kicked him in the gut.

"Ibiki may want to stop asshole, but me and my kid wouldn't mind going on _all_ day." Anko grinned sadistically as she leaned on Kabuto. As if to emphasize this Naruto picked up a blowtorch and turned the valve until the flame was four inches long. Kabuto began shaking. Naruto blinked and walked over to Kabuto, and brought the blowtorch even with his eyes. The flame came closer to his face.

"_STOP_" the white haired medic shouted at the ceiling of the room. Ibiki smirked and Naruto stopped moving the blowtorch.

"Are you going to answer our questions Yakushi?" Ibiki knelt down to one knee and looked Kabuto in the eyes

"Yes…"

"Good." Ibiki glanced at Naruto and Anko. Naruto turned off the blowtorch and put it down, but left it in Kabuto's line of sight. Anko picked up her trench coat from where she had hung it next to the door. The T&I specialist threw her son his own, and they walked out of the room.

"Let's take it from the top, Yakushi." Ibiki turned back to his prisoner.

_Outside ANBU T&I_

"Shouldn't you guys have washed off?" a chunin commented as Naruto and Anko walked outside with blood spatter decorating their faces and hands. They shrugged and walked through the several gates toward the outside world. An ANBU walked by the chunin, who was muttering about indecency.

"Are you new here or something? Those two don't really give a damn what people think as long as they have each other." The ANBU laughed. The chunin just shook his head and walked away.

* * *

_With Anko and Naruto. _

Anko and Naruto stopped in the middle of the street.

"Hey squirt, I've gotta go to the Sarutobi Compound. I'll meet you back at the tower with dinner."

"Later, mom." Naruto waved and walked away.

"See ya, squirt." Anko flickered away.

" Naruto!"

The blond torture specialist turned to see Shikamaru and Ino. The Nara was walked, but Ino was running up to him.

"Hey, Naruto, you never told us what was with your new look!" Ino spouted off as she ran up him.

"Would you believe me if I told you this is what I looked like all the time, and I was just undercover?" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"Nope, but I'm more interested in the blood on your face and hands, even if I have the feeling it's going to be troublesome for me." Shikamaru strolled up.

"I work at Torture and Interrogations, and I didn't feel like washing off. I got my subject to break, so I could leave." Naruto shrugged, while Shikamaru nodded in understanding. Meanwhile the human bullhorn hit the panic button in the middle of the street.

"_You torture people?"_ Ino shouted at the top of her lungs. Shikamaru sighed and looked at the sky while Naruto face palmed.

"Yes, yes I do. But the people we take care of at T&I are dangerous people who work for even more dangerous people. For example three months ago my mom broke a guy that revealed a large group of A-Rank missing-nin was planning to assassinate the Fire Daimyo. Information that wouldn't have come into our hands had we allowed him to just sit in a cell. The people we torture aren't people. They're subjects. Sources of information. Nothing more. Later." Naruto turned and stalked away in the way only him and his mother could.

"Ino, Hayate-sensei told us about Naruto and Anko-sensei working at T&I remember?" Shikamaru sighed as only a Nara could. Ino just stood by and wondered what had happened to the immature idiot that had graduated from the Academy a few months ago.

* * *

_Sarutobi Compound_

"So that's the situation Anko. Pick three people to take with you as a personal team." Hiruzen finished. Anko answered without hesitation.

"Naruto Mitarashi, Genma Shiranui and Hana Inuzuka."

Sarutobi wasn't surprised. Naruto because that was the person she trust most in the world, and her son had developed into a great ninja. Genma because of Genma's overall good combat skill and the fact that he was used to working with Naruto, and Hana for the Inuzuka tracking abilities.

"Why not Team Thirteen?"

"I'd love to take them, but taking rookie genin who haven't even made their first kill on a mission like this isn't just irresponsible it's cruel to the genin. I'm usually not sentimental, but I remember my first kill..."

The Hokage nodded and referred to the three names she had mentioned before.

"You have them. I'll send an ANBU to find Hana, Naruto, and Genma. You go pack up and get ready for an extended mission. You leave tonight." Hiruzen signaled for several ANBU while Anko left the room with a shunshin.

* * *

_Konoha West Gate: Midnight_

Izumo and Kotetsu kept an eye out for any intruders or eavesdroppers while Genma, Hana, Anko, and Naruto stood in a circle. All were wearing standard Konoha-nin flak jackets and body suits.

"Alright, Genma, Naruto you already know why we're here. Hana I'll explain after we're out of the village. We're to patrol the western border. Two more squads will follow at another point in time. Let's go." The Konoha squad disappeared.

* * *

Across Konoha a sleep deprived teenager sat the roof of his hotel rocking back and forth holding his legs.

"Naruto...Mitarashi..." was the only thing he could say. Over and over again.

**Reviews are appreciated**

**Will Konoha be destroyed at the hands of Shukaku? Will the Sandaime survive with the help of Jiraiya? WILL I EVER GET MY WAFFLES AND BACON? Read the next chapter to find out. **


	16. Preparations

**I don't own Naruto.**

**To tired to make a joke.**

**Basically explains Konoha's preparations.**

**PAIRING POLL**

**Yugao-Six**

**Kurotsuchi-Three**

**Temari-zero**

**Hana-zero(Ok I was expecting that one)**

**We have one more chapter until it's definite. Post your vote before then. In the reviews or PM me.**

Chapter 16: Preparations

Naruto, Genma, Hana, and Anko jumped through the trees heading for the Wind/Fire border. They'd left the night before and were going to arrive at their post around noon.

"So mom why are they only sending three teams of shinobi to ambush Suna?" Naruto turned his head to look at his mother.

"Three battalions of chunin will be following around a week before the exams. Until then its just us, and whoever Hayate and Yugao bring. Having Yugao will probably mean ANBU. I don't know who Hayate is bringing. Maybe his genin squad, but I doubt it."

Hana began talking now.

"You know this is a good line up. Yugao and her ANBU for direct combat, my hounds for tracking targets down, and we have Anko and Naruto to interrogate anyone we capture."

Genma agreed with the Inuzuka, and Anko kept silent. Naruto spoke up.

"Uh, guys…you think this will develop into something worse?" he sounded worried.

"War?" Anko's voice hollow

"Yeah." Naruto answered.

"I hope not." Hana shook her head. Everyone murmured agreement. Before long they arrived in a clearing. Anko held up a hand.

"Alright, this is where we'll set up the forward base. Genma you're on wall duty. Naruto start unsealing those supplies. Hana you're on traps. I'll get started on the shelters." The four shinobi went to their assorted jobs.

* * *

_Hokage's Tower, Konohagakure._

"Hokage-sama, I'd like my ANBU squad assigned to me for the pre-emptive strike group." Yugao looked to Jiraiya. The sannin bit his lip in thought. Three jounin, and an ANBU was already a loss in strength. Losing three more ANBU could affect the fighting strength of the unit. But Yugao hadn't worked with anyone else besides her ANBU squad in years, and might lose some of her effectiveness without them, and having a weakened jounin leading an attack group could affect the fighting strength as well. Yugao stood at attention waiting for the sannin's answer. Finally Jiraiya sighed.

"Alright Yugao, you have them, but you're taking up a couple of your markers here. Be aware that you're not going as ANBU you're going as regular forces." Jiraiya turned and started reassigning the ANBU to the ambush group.

"Understood. Thank you, Hokage-sama." Yugao flickered out of existence, and went to pack her gear.

* * *

_Konoha Forward Operations Base_

"Yo, dinner's ready! Come get it before the squirt eats it all!" Anko yelled to the other shinobi constructing the camp. The sun was low in the sky, and was turning red. About three hours ago they'd received word by carrier bird that Yugao and her squad had been dispatched.

"Got to hell mom, besides I'm only a bottomless pit when you sit me at Ichiraku Ramen." Naruto shot back from where he was stacking crates of kunai.

"I know that, you're my kid remember?" Anko grinned.

"Hey it's not my fault you were dumb enough to let me have unlimited amounts." Naruto grinned as he thought as he had won.

"Says the guy who stacked crates by himself. I believe you were the guy who said Ero-Hokage was idiot because he doesn't use shadow clones on his paperwork." Anko checkmated Naruto, who face faulted and stayed like that until Hana and Genma were done laughing at their bickering. Then they collapsed on the food Anko had brought.

"Ugh…field rations…"Naruto groaned.

"Well that's what we have for the whole month so you'd better start to like them." Anko shrugged as she choked down some of the horrible food.

"These things taste worse than Gai smells after his morning workout." Genma complained. Anko and Naruto cut their eyes to the senbon chewing jounin.

"So you enjoy smelling Gai, huh?" Anko began the torture. Hana smiled into her bowl as she waited for entertainment.

"Oh don't even twist my words like that." Genma rolled his eyes.

"Look Genma, it's not our fault that your bared your sexual preference in front of everyone." Naruto shrugged.

"Now look here you little twerp…" Genma and Naruto started firing insults. Hana scooted over next to Anko.

"Normal occurrence?" Hana raised her eyebrow.

"Don't let it get to you, they're actually really good friends. Kind of like me and Iruka." Anko went back to her food.

"Anko…you scare Iruka…" Hana blinked.

"Yeeeeeah." Anko smiled

* * *

_With Yugao and her squad_

Yugao and her squad were clad in the standard jounin gear as well, and as they arrived in the clearing that was to be Konoha's base, they saw Hana and Anko making bets as to who would come out of the dust cloud created by Naruto and Genma grappling on the ground. The ANBU just sat down and grabbed food to watch the fight.

"Hey guys." Anko greeted as she scraped her spoon on the bottom of her bowl.

"Another insult match?" Yugao asked as she spooned out some of the food.

"Mhm." Hana sat her bowl down and let her nin-hounds, the Haimaru Triplets, finish it off. Yugao just shook her head, and watched the two men fight. As soon as the last ANBU shinobi was seated the dust cleared and Genma was standing over Naruto with his right foot on the Mitarashi's chest.

"I win…" Genma looked own. Naruto spun and knocked Genma's left foot out from under him, and the tokujo fell down onto the ground.

"You both suck…" Yugao observed, and everyone present laughed. Naruto and Genma got up and dusted themselves off. They returned to find their food had been stolen by the Haimaru triplets.

"Aw, come on!" Naruto shouted.

"Anyway, who's that with you?" Anko asked Yugao.

"That's Yamato (A/N Tenzo), Suji, and Yuji. Yes, Suji and Yuji are siblings."

The three ANBU in chunin uniforms gave short waves. Anko and Naruto had seen Yamato around T&I, but the other two were unknown to them. They both had dark blue hair. Yuji was about a three inches taller than his sister, and Suji was around Anko's height. They both had a ninjato strapped to their back.

"Good to meet you guys." Naruto nodded.

"Like wise." The ANBU nodded back. They'd seen the two Mitarashis at work, and had a certain respect for them.

* * *

_Konohagakure_

_Hokage's Office_

Hayate chose his team, and Kakashi silently cursed as Hayate chose Shikaku Nara as one his team members. Kakashi had been wanting the Nara to help plan out his defenses. Then sighed in relief when Jiraiya objected to his choice.

"Hayate, I can see why you'd like to take Shikaku, but we need him at the village."

"That's what I thought you were going to say…" Hayate sighed ", alright, Tsume, Izumo, and Kotetsu."

Jiraiya nodded.

"I don't want another Tokujo gone, but since I denied you Shikaku you can have Tsume." Jiraiya turned to get the orders. Hayate left as soon as he had them.

"Alright, Kakashi, that leaves you with every tokujo minus, Anko, Hayate, Genma and Tsume. All the higher end chunin except for Naruto, Izumo, and Kotetsu, all the ANBU besides Yugao and her squad, and _all_ the jounin, and genin. Take your pick of your command team.

"Shikaku, Ibiki, and Gai." Kakashi answered without hesitation.

"You have them. Now get out of my office, so I can catch up on my slee…er my paperwork." Jiraiya shooed his biggest fan out of the room and locked the door before laying down on the couch.

* * *

_Konoha Forward Operations Base, next morning._

Genma's team came within sight of the camp, after passing the numerous kunai, pit, and explosive traps on the way in. The word done by the eight shinobi that were ahead of them was nothing short of remarkable. A 100 square yards of forest had been turned into a military base as stone walls topped with razor wire, which had electricity running through it surrounded twelve two story wooden houses. A large supply dump was on the east end behind more electrified concertina wire. It was guarded by two figures. The tokujo and his team couldn't make out who.

"Halt!" a voice shouted from the wall. Hana walked out of the forest with the Haimaru triplets in tow. Genma appeared on a platform behind the wall. Hayate and his team stopped and waited for orders. They'd rather _not_ get speared by hundreds of kunai.

"Oh it's just you guys…well come on in, Naruto and Yugao are getting breakfast started. You have to get it before they start screaming about whether miso or shrimp ramen is better. Once that happens no more food gets made." Genma laughed. A hole opened in the wall beneath the platform, and the four Konoha-nin entered their home for the next three weeks.

* * *

**Reviews are appreciated. **

**MAYBE another chapter tonight. Little more excitment in it. **


	17. Patrol

**Sorry for lack of updates,** **I've been working on other stuff.**

**Unfortunately SHORT CHAPTER.**

**It's only detailing the function of the Konoha FOB.**

**The Sound invasion will happen around two or three chapters from now.**

**So enough of my ramblings.**

**As Always**

**Enjoy :D**

**BY THE WAY I DON'T OWN NARUTO AND I JUST SAID IT LIKE THAT BECAUSE IM TO BORED TO TYPE IN A WITTY JOKE.**

Chapter 17:Opening Moves

_One mile from Konoha F.O.B_

Tsume and Kuromaru, Tsume's companion, sniffed the air for any unfamiliar scents. Kuromaru turned to Tsume and whispered.

"Two chakra signatures. To the west. They're suppressed."

Tsume nodded, and keyed the radio on her neck.

"Command, this is Patrol One. Kuromaru has a pair of suppressed chakra signatures coming in. Requesting the QRF at RV Point Echo."

Anko's voice came back through her ear.

_"Patrol One, this is Command. QRF is on the way ETA five minutes." _

"Roger. Moving now, out."

_"Copy, keep us posted, out."_

Tsume jumped away on an intercept course with the pair of unknown signatures. Before long she was crouched on a branch. In front of her was a river with a clearing of around fifty feet on either side. The river was shallow enough to wade through.

"What's up, Tsume?"

Genma, Yugao, and Naruto landed in the same tree as Tsume.

"Pair of unknowns approaching. They'll arrive here in around five minutes."

"Ok. What's the plan?" Genma was crouched low on a branch just above her.

"Yugao challenges them. Genma you back her up. Naruto and I hold back, and if they start trouble we take one while you guys take the other." Tsume ordered. The other three Konoha-nin nodded as a pair of figures ran into the clearing on the other side of the river. Yugao and Genma jumped out of the tree and landed directly across the river from the pair of travelers, who stopped. Yugao's voice rang out.

"You're intruding on the Land of Fire. State your business here."

Meanwhile all four were examining their targets. Oto-nin. Both were wearing grey body suits under a pair of black flak vests, and black ninja sandals. Their legs were wrapped from the ankle down.

"We're on our way to the chunin exams in Konoha. I don't think you have the right to impede us." One of them smirked.

"Do you have travel permits?" Yugao raised an eyebrow as her hand inched closer to her ninjato.

"No. But I don't think we need them if we're going to the chunin exams." The other was as smug as the first.

Meanwhile Tsume and Naruto were making their way behind the pair of Oto-nin.

"Turn around and leave the Land of Fire or we'll have to use force…"Yugao was monotone and her hand was now on her ninjato, drawing it an inch out of its scabbard. The two Oto-nin laughed out loud before rushing Yugao and Genma.

_"_Gatsuuga!" a pair of blurred forms intercepted one of them, and Naruto followed into the clearing.

"Guys, take one alive, so Anko and I can work him over!" Naruto shouted before shouting out

"Striking Shadow Snakes!" the two enemy shinobi dodged his attack and split up.

One of the Oto-nin turned on Tsume and Naruto and smirked while the other charged Genma and Yugao. The ANBU and tokujo made quick work of him. The remaining Oto-nin felt something pierce his ankle and he looked down to see a viper.

"Damn…" was all he said before crumpling to the ground. Naruto ran over and gave him an antitoxin as the Oto-nin fell unconscious. Yugao tied the enemy shinobi up with ninja wire, while Tsume keyed her radio.

"Command this is Patrol One. QRF and myself neutralized the unknown contacts. Oto-nin. Be advised, one prisoner."

_"Command copies all Patrol One. Send my squirt back with the prisoner, and resume patrolling. Take either Genma or Yugao with you and send the other back with Naruto." _Anko's voice came back.

"You got it. Patrol One, out."

Tsume relayed the information and Naruto left with Yugao and the prisoner, while Genma and Tsume moved to the next checkpoint.

_Konoha F.O.B._

Anko had her feet up on a camp table when Naruto entered her tent. Her son jumped backwards and covered his eyes, dropping the Oto-nin in the process.

"Mom you're wearing a skirt, god. Please take your feet off you table before you scar me even more." Naruto sighed. Anko laughed, took her feet off the table, and walked over to the Oto-nin. The interrogation specialist tied him to a metal chair she had brought along for this purpose. The Oto-nin began to awake. His eyes snapped open when he realized he was bound with ninja wire. The oto-nin looked up to see a grinning Naruto and Anko, the latter having a torture kit ready.

"Hi, I'm Anko Mitarashi and this is Naruto, my kid. We're going to be your interrogators today, would you kindly answer the questions we ask?"

The ninja was silent.

"Okay then. The fun way it is." Anko grinned and unlocked the clasps on her case.

_With Yugao and Tenzo_

"Ugh, man those two enjoy their job to much." Tenzo commented as they walked the perimeter of the camp.

"They have an outlet for their anger just like everyone else. This is it. I'd rather Naruto do this than jump on some random villager and tear his throat out." Yugao shook her head and stared out at the forest.

"True. Think they'll find out anything?"

"No doubt. That duo is hard to resist, and when they get together with Ibiki no one could resist. I know I wouldn't be able to resist." Yugao shivered, and spotted Tsume and Genma coming into the perimeter, while Hana and Suji left. Hayate was on top of the wall keeping watch, and Yuji was blowing trees with paper bombs to allow for a bigger clearing around the F.O.B.

"Outpost duty is kind of boring isn't it?" Yugao walked

"Yeah, but things are going to get, uh…exciting…in the next couple weeks." Tenzo shrugged. Both ANBU flinched when a particularly loud scream erupted from the command tent.

"Ouch." Was all both ANBU had to say when they switched with Izumo and Kotetsu for guard duty.

_With Anko and Naruto_

What was left of the Oto-nin fell to the floor when Naruto cut him loose. Anko pursed her lips and looked at the enemy ninja.

"Think there's any chance of him surviving?"

"Maybe, but we don't have a lot of medical supplies." Naruto shrugged.

"Eh, we gave him our word that we'd help him if he gave up information." Anko ordered Naruto to take him over to the medical tent.

"You got it." Naruto lifted up the Oto-nin and left the tent, while Anko threw a tarp over the blood and sealed the chair in a storage scroll.

_Konohagakure: Hokage's Office. _

Jiraiya looked at the battered Oto-nin in front of him. He'd had the ANBU pull the records of her for him, and he was currently holding the file in his hand. The Godaime Hokage opened the file and started reading.

_Konohagakure Chunin Exams Entry_

_Name: Kin Tsuchi_

_Age: 14_

_Affiliation: Otogakure _

_Missions:_

_D-Rank: N/A_

_C-Rank: 15_

_B-Rank-3_

_A-Rank-0_

_Chakra Affinity(s) – Wind_

_No further information_

Jiraiya looked up at Kin Tsuchi.

"So, Kin, my ANBU tell me you've requested political asylum in Konoha."

"Yes, Hokage-sama." Kin's voice sounded hopeful

"Why?" Jiraiya raised his eyebrow.

"Orochimaru-sama tried to kill me." Kin looked at the ground.

"And he's never threatened to do this before?"

"Yes he has, but this time he wanted to use me and my squad as sacrifices for a jutsu."

"And what jutsu is that?"

"Reanimation."

Jiraiya's eyes shot up from where he was re-reading her file.

"Reanimation? The Second Hokage's forbidden jutsu?"

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

"Well then, I can see why you'd want to join Konoha, but tell me this, how can we trust you?"

"I'll give you all of my information on the invasion we both know is coming as well as the locations of everyone of Orochimaru's hideouts I know of."

Jiraiya smirked.

"Deal. ANBU!"

An ANBU in a Hawk mask walked from the wall.

"Yes, Hokage-sama?"

"Take her to ANBU HQ, and put her under witness protection."

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

Kin turned to follow the ANBU. When they were gone Jiraiya smiled.

"I can't wait to see that pedophile's face when this thing kicks off."

_With Kiba and Sasuke._

"Hey Sasuke have you noticed that security is a lot tighter lately?"

"Yes. I've also noticed that a few shinobi have disappeared altogether. For example, Naruto and Anko."

Kiba nodded.

"Yeah, my sister and mom got sent off on a long term mission. They wouldn't say anything, but they both left with teams of chunin and jounin."

Sasuke nodded.

"Something strange is going on." the Uchiha walked away.

"Hey where are you going?"

"To get a new set of kunai shuriken, and get my current sets repaired. If the jounin and chunin are gearing up so am I."

Kiba nodded and took off after his friend.

**UGH...such a bad chapter T.T**

**I'm afraid that I have an extreme case of writers block. I've tried jackhammers, C4, and an airstrike, but nothing is helping...**

**Again sorry for the delay, and the let down of this chapter.**


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